'Game of Thrones' Season 3 Premiere Recap: The War Has Just Begun
The Episode "Valar Dohaeris" in a Nutshell:
- Jon Snow meets Wildling leader Mance Rayder
- Daenerys arrives at Astapor to buy a slave army
- Margaery Tyrell makes power plays in King's Landing
Body count: Around 200
Nudity count: 1
Dragon sightings: 3
New people and places:
- The city of Astapor
- Wildling warrior Tormund Giantsbane
- Wildling leader Mance Rayder
- Naathi servant Missandei
- Slave owner Kraznys
Tyrion Lannister's best line: "You must be proud to be as funny as a man whose balls brush his knees."
What's the deal with … Littlefinger's plan for Sansa? What does the sneaky man want with her?
Winter is here, and it looks like it's going to be a brutal one. The Season 3 premiere of "Game of Thrones" doesn't feature a ton of fireworks; instead, there's a lot of political intrigue, chess moves, and positioning. The Battle of the Blackwater may be over, but the war for the world has just begun.
North of the Wall: Sam and the Night's Watch
Last we saw the Night's Watch, they were headed for a clash with an army of White Walkers. Guess the men didn't fare well, since we open with a terrified Sam Tarly running as fast as he can (which isn't very fast). He comes face to face with an ax-wielding zombie, but is saved by Jon Snow's direwolf Ghost and then fire from his Night's Watch brothers. The Lord Commander Mormont asks if Sam sent the ravens -- his only job. He hangs his head in reply. Get it together, Tarly! Mormont orders the troupe to return to the Wall to warn the rest of Westeros.
North of the Wall: Jon, Ygritte, and Mance Rayder
Ygritte's party of Wildlings leads a wide-eyed Jon to their humongous camp, which boasts some humongous giants within it. "Have you never seen a giant, Jon Snow?" Ygritte snarks. (You know she totally wants to make out with him.) "When they're angry, I've seen them pound a man straight into the ground like a hammer to a nail."
Inside Mance Rayder's tent, Jon kneels before a red-haired warrior, but the real Mance Rayder (Ciaran Hinds) comes over laughing. He's impressed that Jon killed Qhuorin Halfhand, but why does he want to join them? To be free, Jon answers, but Mance isn't having it. Finally, Jon says that he saw a White Walker at Craster's Keep, and that the Lord Commander already knew about them. "I want to fight for the side that fights for the living," Jon says. That seems to convince Mance enough that he orders Jon some new clothes. Spiffy!
King's Landing: The Lannisters and Tyrells
How far Tyrion Lannister has fallen. As he examines his scar in a less-than-luxurious room, Cersei comes knocking. He's wary; after all, his sister is likely the one who ordered a soldier to try to kill him during the Battle of the Blackwater. Cersei wants to know what he plans to talk to their father about later, and after sparring a bit, she leaves.
Who's more clever? Watch the conversation between siblings Tyrion and Cersei:
At his meeting with Tywin, Tyrion needles his father about not coming to check up on him. And he'd like a little gratitude for leading the battle. "Jugglers and singers require applause. You are a Lannister," the new King's Hand drawls. Then Tyrion asks to be named heir of Casterly Rock, which makes Tywin see red. "To teach me humility, the gods have condemned me to watch you waddle about," he snarls, "But neither gods or men will ever compel me to let you turn Casterly Rock into your whorehouse." Awww … poor Tyrion. Where's Shae to give him a hug?