'Game of Thrones' Recap: Wargs and All
The Episode "Dark Wings, Dark Words" in a Nutshell:
- Bran makes new friends with the Reed children
- Arya runs into the Brotherhood Without Banners
- Tyrell matriarch Lady Olenna questions Sansa
- Theon Greyjoy is tortured
- Jaime and Brienne sword fight
Body count: 0
Nudity count: 0
Dragon sightings: 0
New people and places:
- Lady Olenna, Margaery's grandmother
- Jojen and Meera Reed
- Orell Skinchanger, a wildling warg
- Thoros of Myr, a red priest with the Brotherhood Without Banners
- Locke, one of Lord Bolton's liegemen
Best line: "Once the cow's been milked, there's no squirting the cream back up her udder." -- Lady Olenna
What's the deal with … Theon's torturers? Who are they, and what do they want?
Patience, friends. While there's very little action (battle- or sex-wise) again in this second episode of "Game of Thrones" Season 3, the show is still moving its chess pieces into interesting places. Sadly, there's no Daenerys this week, and very little Tyrion, but we get updates on all the other Stark kids.
Somewhere in the North: Bran, Rickon, Osha, and Hodor
In a dream, Bran runs through the forest and spies the three-eyed raven in a tree. As he draws his bow, brothers Robb and Jon appear beside him (and his father's voice echoes in the trees) in a reference to the very first episode. Then, a blond-headed boy appears. "You can't kill it, you know," he says. "The raven is you." Bran wakes with a start.
Later, when they make a new camp, Osha and a growling direwolf Summer both sense a presence in the woods. After she leaves to scout around, that boy appears again. This is no dream, though. Osha returns and puts a spear to him, but another girl -- his sister -- puts a knife to her. Summer keeps growling, but when the boy approaches with his hand held out, she relaxes and trots off. Who is this kid?!
Turns out he's Jojen Reed. The girl is Meera Reed. Their father, Howland, was a good friend of Ned's. As the whole party continues traveling north, Jojen informs Bran that he's a warg, which means he can enter the minds of animals. Not only that, but Bran has "the Sight" -- he can see things that happened before, things that haven't happened yet, and things that are happening right now, thousands of miles away. Cool, cool, cool.
King's Landing: Sansa, Joffrey, Margaery, and Tyrion
Sansa insists to a dubious Shae that Littlefinger didn't ask her for anything during their little chat. "Men only want one thing from a pretty girl," Shae warns. Loras Tyrell knocks at the door, asking to escort Sansa to tea with his sister and their grandmother, Lady Olenna.
The sharp-tongued grandmother could give the Dowager Countess on "Downton Abbey" a run for her money (if highborn ladies cared about such a thing). She doesn't think very highly of her son and thought her family's backing of Renly Baratheon was dumb. "But once the cow's been milked, there's no squirting the cream back up her udder," she sighs.
Lady Olenna gets right to the point: She wants to know what Joffrey is really like. Terrified and uncertain, Sansa stammers out that he's handsome and fair and as brave as a lion. The matriarch nearly snorts. "Yes, and when a Tyrell farts, it smells like a rose," she says. Finally, they pester her into admitting that Joffrey is a monster. Margaery sighs and looks resigned.
But these Tyrell women are made of steel, and Margaery, in particular, knows how to play Joffrey. Later, when he snarks about her marriage to Renly, she adopts the "subservient woman" mask and says she was only doing her duty. Batting her eyelashes and stroking Joffrey's crossbow, Margaery taps into his horny-teenage-boy side by pulling the "Can you help demonstrate this big, heavy weapon for me?" trick. And of course he falls for it.
Elsewhere in the castle, Tyrion returns to his room to find Shae waiting. He warns her not to come around anymore, since Tywin threatened to kill her. But she's worried about Sansa. Tyrion shrugs it off, saying that Sansa is beautiful and will have many suitors. Shae acts jealous and he backpedals. Makeup-sex time!