Parker Posey may have yet to win an Emmy award — but if she does, she's got the acceptance speech covered.
In a hilarious new video titled "Emmy Speech Master Class," Posey spoofs the worst clichés of award show speeches -- everything from the tears to the name-dropping.
Posey appears in the three-minute clip as "JA,N" (which stands for "Just Act, Naturally"), a professional acting coach with 30 years of experience who teaches a class specifically about Emmy speeches, which she calls "the most important part of any actor's career."
JA,N's speech tips include pitching a show ("You have everyone in the industry there!"), taking your clothes off, and sobbing. "When you see someone in the audience, be like, 'Hey, Bryan Cranston, I loved doing theater with you at Steppenwolf," she tells one student, who responds, "But I don't know Bryan Cranston."
"It doesn't matter," according to JA,N. "Just say it, because it's the Emmys. They don't know theater here."
Check out the full video below, and catch Posey on the season premiere of New Girl on Sept. 25.