Wondering what Santa Claus thinks about the fabricated issues of the day? You're in luck.
"Fox and Friends" booked an author who plays Santa on Thursday to discuss the supposed war on Christmas, in which people sometimes voluntarily say "Happy holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas."
Pity the poor child who turned on Fox News in the middle of the interview to find Santa complaining that kids are no longer allowed to sit on his lap in England, that he can't say "ho" in Australia, and that that he can no longer go to other people's office parties.
We miss the old Santa, whose biggest worry was whether Rudolph's nose would be bright enough.
Watch the video: