Fox Theme Park: Our 'Sons of Anarchy' Wish List

Mandi Bierly
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Sons of Anarchy fans, get ready to hit the road in 2018.

There are plans for a 20th Century Fox World theme park and resort in Dubai. Per the announcement, highlights will include:

  • Theme park consisting of themed lands and attractions based on Fox properties, including Ice Age, Rio, Planet of the Apes, Aliens, Predator, Night at the Museum, Titanic, The Simpsons, and Sons of Anarchy.

  • A broad attraction mix, ranging from media-based dark rides to thrill rides that will tell new stories based on Fox film and television brands.

  • A themed retail street featuring unique shopping and dining based on Fox properties.

  • The world’s first Fox-themed resort hotel.

Here are five things we hope to see.

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1. Obviously, we want a media-based dark ride, which would feel like you’re truly immersed in the Sons of Anarchy: The Prospect game (pictured). Say a group of eight rides through on stationary Harleys and has to work together as a club to make deals and evade rival MCs, and gangs, and the local sheriff who trusts the outlaws to keep the town safe.

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Do we have to be family-friendly? If we can’t be shooting laser guns at men (different than zombies, we know), we still need to include some target practice…

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So maybe there’s a trivia-based section of the ride where everyone in the club fires a shot at whatever they think is the correct answer. How did Kozik die? (Stepped on a landmine. Boom.)

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Who’s this? (Greensleeves the pimp.)

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What liquid was in the bathtub when Tig drowned the porn producer? (Urine.)

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Okay, family-friendly may be a problem.

2. An eatery. The obvious would be to have a clubhouse setup, complete with Reaper tables. Yes, plural, unless you want a riot. And if you don’t use the trivia idea in the ride, have a “Trivia Target Practice” shooting range here.

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If the space is big enough, also have a prison dining hall section for people who just want to finish their pie (i.e. just order dessert)…

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…and a quiet section that looks like Gemma’s dining room.

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3. A spa. Every resort needs one. If you don’t want to call it Diosa (bad memories), we’d suggest Venus.

Also, the spa will need to look out onto a rose garden.

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4. Clever merch. Will it be too dangerous to sell carving forks?

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Then you’ve at least got to give us this robe…

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…and Nero’s cardigans.

Instead of dressing up for old-timey photos, you can get temporary tattoos (and bullet wounds, unless that’s again pushing it) and pose as characters from the show.

5. Forget benches throughout the park for people to sit on, have bikes. It’s just cooler.

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