"CBS This Morning": Wow, what an amazing story, Sara Blakely! I think I speak for all women when I say Spanx for the memories, and the inspiration! (That is, I will speak for all women, once I get these things off so I can get enough breathe...)
"GMA": Okay, that snowboarding opossum video was so great I immediately demand a sequel! How about a tubing otter? Raccoon on a sled? Downhill ferrets? Skiing Weasels? Yeah, let's greenlight that production, stat. "Ski Weazlzz!" I can already see the poster.
"Today": To beard or not to beard? That is the question "Today" posed, and I gotta say — I'm a beard! Wait, I mean I'm a beard woman. Meaning I like beards and I'm female, not that I can grow a thick facial coif! You probably knew what I meant the first time, but now this has just gotten hairy!
"Ellen": Ellen's bit of scaring celebs is all fun and games until someone has a heart attack! And who knew Megan Fox was once a giant banana outside a smoothie place?! Keep that in mind the next time you drive by one of those people and laugh at their situation. Because guess who's laughing now? Megan Fox and all her beauty and millions of dollars!
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