“The View”: I know it was just a slip of the tongue when Melania Trump said "buttocks" instead of "Botox", so I understand that she seemed annoyed when all the ladies were getting a big kick out of it. But she's gotta understand that when you're as beautiful as she is, and as rich as she is, people are always looking for a reason to poke fun of you. Take it from me, I love to laugh at really rich and beautiful people!
“Wendy Williams”: It's good to have Wendy back from a long vacation! Whenever she's gone I still need someone to ask me how I'm doin' every morning, so I just end up asking myself that question in the mirror! And then I answer myself. And then those around me are worried about me. It becomes this whole ordeal that I would prefer to avoid. So, again, thank you for being back Wendy!
“Live!”: So wait, Kelly Ripa seriously thought writing "LOL" at the end of a text message meant "Lots of Love"?!? Well, that explains why when my Aunt Zelda accidentally drove her Rascal scooter into that fountain at the mall, Kelly texted me with "Heard about your Aunt, LOL!"
“GMA”: Harrison Ford wore an earring in one ear for his interview today, because Harrison Ford wants you to know that Harrison Ford is still young and cool, and can hang with the kids. Also, in reality, Harrison Ford is almost 71 years old. WOW. I hope the Rebel Alliance offers Medicare coverage.
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