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Jon Cryer's Hair-Loss Confession: His 'Two and a Half Men' Mane Is Fake!

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The magic of television is so powerful, it can produce hair where there is none!

"Two and a Half Men" star Jon Cryer revealed Monday night that he is nearly bald. The "spectacular mane of unruly wonderfulness" that he sported back in the '80s in movies like "Pretty in Pink" is gone and his hair on the hit comedy is actually an "elaborate illusion."

"This is the work of several talented professionals making the most of, like, four hairs," he told Conan O'Brien on the host's late-night show. "It's amazing, actually, what they can do. I'm not wearing a piece or anything like that, but it's a long, involved process that starts with stuff like shoe polish."

[Related: Happy Movember! Enjoy 25 Great TV Mustaches]

Yes, the Emmy-winning actor's hair is painted on.

"They get a roller type thing and just whoosh along the top," Cryer explained. "You have to decide if you're going to go full [John] Travolta and get the full front in. And then they literally sprinkle powder in from a salt shaker."

Jon Cryer's Hair-Loss Confession: His 'Two and a Half Men' Mane Is Fake!

Left: Cryer at the Farmers Market in Studio City, Calif. on July 14, 2013. // Center: Cryer in "Two and a Half Men" // Right: Cryer in "Pretty in Pink"

A flabbergasted O'Brien asked what happens to the fake hair when it rains.

"You're out of luck," Cryer laughed. "It flattens out and you can get the nice little rivulets going down. But thankfully, your eyebrows will channel down the side."

RIP, Ducky's coif!