Hook me up with some!
“Today”: Wow, Paula Deen was in rare form today! She was dancing and laughing and pretty much having a good ol' time. The internet is already abuzz that she was drunk, but I don't think that's the case. I think she was just happy to be hanging out in Miami, I mean who wouldn't be?! Besides, I don't think they make a butter with alcohol in it. If they do, somebody better hook me up with some!
“Ellen”: Hmm, when Ellen plays hidden-earpiece games with stars like Dennis Quaid and Jennifer Aniston, they end up frightening the public and sounding like deranged lunatics. When she fed lines to Steve Harvey, his audience acted normally and thought he sounded like... Steve Harvey. I feel like this explains a lot.
“Live!” Michael Strahan got himself a gig as a red carpet reporter for the Oscars! Sweet gig, Mike, but hey -- how come that never works the other way? One of these days I want to see Hugh Jackman and Dame Judy Dench sideline reporting a Cowboys-Giants game!
Watch "Daytime in No Time" right now and e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org!
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