I Couldn’t Find The Dang Remote!

"Today": The band One Direction was on the show and I'm sure they said a lot of amazing things about their career and songs and touring… but all I could focus on was their cute faces, dreamy eyes and uber-hip haircuts. I didn't hear a word of the interview… because my TV was on mute and I couldn't find the dang remote!

"GMA": Did you see that clip of Katy Perry without makeup? Why that's like showing cake without frosting! Or pancakes without syrup! Or any other female celebrity without... makeup! Although I've gotta say, she still looked pretty gorgeous, even though she'd obviously woken up in Vegas.

"The View": I was feeling pretty young when Joy, Whoopi and Barbara were talking about how their kids are all around 40-years-old. But that was quickly balanced out when they did their summer toy segment and it made me feel about 100-years-old! Electric scooters, 3-D sidewalk chalk and a gun that blows giant bubbles with minimal effort?! I miss the good ol' days of big wheels, trying to find a white rock to write on the sidewalk and struggling to get a good bubble out of a single bubble blower!

"Wake Up With Al": It's hard to feel bad for the guy in Zimbabwe who was crowned Mr. Ugly, because not only did he get a big rise out of the crowd, he also won $100 and a two-night stay in a hotel! I mean, I'm a Webby Awards Honoree and I could only dream of getting two nights in a hotel!

Watch "Daytime in No Time" right now and e-mail me at daytimeinnotime@yahoo.com!

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