Chris Siegfried isn't just the winner of the latest edition of "The Bachelorette." He's also a poetry man. And in case you're wondering how he pulled Desiree Hartsock out of the dumps after she was, um, dumped by Brooks Forester, let's face it, it was his poetry, man. This guy can whip up some serious verse at the drop of a rose (wasn't he perfect on that message-in-a-bottle date?), and now he's even published his own poetic memoir called "Diamonds + Hearts."
Check out Chris Siegfried's biggest "Bachelorette" moments, set to his own prose:
1. Opening night on "The Bachelorette" is full of gimmicks, and Chris didn't hesitate to impress Des with one on his first night at the mansion. For his intro to "The Bachelorette" star, he stepped out of the limo and got down on one knee. But before you accuse him of moving too fast, this jokester simply asked Des if she minded if he tied his shoe. Whew! But Chris got some more mileage out of that moment when he included it in his poem, "Hesitation No More":
2. Chris won big at the dodge ball group date. After plowing his way through the game and taking on Zack K. for the big win, he scored the group date rose and got some one-on-one time with Des at a rooftop Kate Earl concert. That was also the scene of Chris and Des's very first kiss. Of course, we hope that kiss meant more to him than the kiss he refers to in his poem, "Raise a Toast."
3. Chris is clearly a jack-of-all-trades. Not only can he write some badass poetry, he can also swing a mean Hula-Hoop. At the group Mr. America pageant date in Atlantic City, Chris whooped it up with a hoop — while wearing heels! Is he a cross-dresser or was he just looking for material for another poem? From his poem "Thoughts So True":
4. Who can forget Chris's big hometown date in McMinnville, Oregon? That's where the former minor leaguer introduced Des to his family. But in addition to meeting the parents, Des got some extra attention from Chris's chiropractor dad, who gave her a lumbar adjustment. That wasn't the most bizarre part of this date, because before we knew it, dad was giving his poetic son a nose adjustment, complete with balloons and basters and some cringe-worthy camera close-ups. Which brings us to Chris's poem "Observations."
Yeah, we'd say we saw a different side of Chris's face (Note to Chris: Don't ever do that again!), and there was definitely some twitching going on.
5. It's Chris's way or the highway. During the dream date in Antigua, Chris made it clear that his career was more important than Des's. Hence, his ultimatum, er, suggestion, that she'd need to relocate to his town. But Des was totally down for a relo. In fact, we have to wonder if her poem — which is included as bonus material in her fiancé's book — means she's finally found a place to call home. From Desiree's poem, "Charming and Handsome":
6. The dreaded final rose ceremony. It was a dire day for Des, especially when she had to admit to Chris that she really was in love with Brooks before he skipped town. But after a rambling, teary spiel, our girl still found someone to put a ring on it! That would be Chris, who has a way of turning her frown upside down. Which brings us to his shiny, happy poem, "Smile":