Achieve Epic Things


"Today": I was kind of looking forward to the Olympics being over just so the interviews with all the athletes would taper off. But that hasn't been the case at all, because they're still being interviewed every day! I guess that's what happens when you achieve epic things while representing our country! Oh well, at least one of those interviews helped set up today's awesomely uncomfortable moment when Al called out Matt. That moment got a gold medal… in awkwardness!

"CBS This Morning": "CBS This Morning" promised to take us inside the ping-pong balls when with a report about "how the Powerball lottery machine works". Uhh, if you ask me, it DOESN'T work, you guys, because I didn't win! Sigh... yeah, see you next week.

"GMA": Well, the cute animal segment of the day made me cry again, but this time they had to resort to Gorilla tactics. But I couldn't help it! Seeing those two long lost silverback bros hug it out after so long apart was just too adorable! No word on where Big Bro Gorilla was for 3 years, but I'm just gonna go ahead and assume "The Jersey Shore".

"Wake Up with Al": You might think that seeing a giant road sign bouncing up and down is what made me want to reference "Jump" from Kris Kross today, but you would be wrong. It actually stems from me showing up to work today with both my shirt AND pants on backwards just like Kris Kross used to do, except I did it by accident! It was the craziest thing!

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