Most of the experts say that there's no such thing as an Amish mafia. But the ratings suggest that most viewers don't really care. Over 2 million fans — mostly menfolk — tuned in to welcome back Discovery Channel's league of extraordinarily vigilant crime fighters. If you guys don't think you can make it until Tuesday for a new episode of macho Mennonite madness, you're in luck because we have two exclusive clips.
[Related: 'Amish Mafia' Star Receives Prison Sentence]
Let's start with violence, shall we? In "Amish Stalker," crafty Caleb goes on the hunt for a paparazzo rumored to be snapping pictures of the local scenery. Cameras are not welcome, of course, and Caleb finds the photographer midsnap and promptly goes all Justin Bieber on him. When the paparazzo objects to the destruction of his $400 camera, Caleb assures him that fixing his face would cost a whole lot more. Quick with his fist and his mouth, yes indeed, this dude is quite the fighter:
And now let's take the edge off with a little comical romance. "Merlin's Crown Jewel" features Merlin in full-throttle lover mode, professing his love for Martha, whose face is intentionally blurred from our view, darn it. "When I first laid eyes on Martha, I had shades on," he gushes, as we watch her hang laundry. "But the shades weren't dark enough. She's that hot." At the end of the clip, Merlin takes his lady for a prayer and picnic and lays a very wet and slightly loud kiss on her, leaving no room for doubt about the fire in his ... heart:
"Amish Mafia" airs Tuesdays at 9 PM on Discovery Channel.