"Vivienne Westwood dress, Tom Ford shoes and an O.B. tampon."
It was a low point in red carpet history. Or was it? When Amy Schumer, accompanied by her sister Kim, stopped to chat with E! host Giuliana Rancic on the red carpet at last night's Emmy Awards, the comedienne summed up the catch-22 of being a fashion plate in Hollywood in the age of feminism, a topic I wrote about for THR this week: when you borrow clothes, you have to shill for them, and to a certain extent be defined by them when you do.
Throwing in that too-much-information detail was Schumer's not-so-subtle middle finger at today's Hollywood fashion system. Naturally, social media went wild with support, and you can bet her agent has already fielded a call from O.B. to inquire about a partnership.
Schumer has been pretty vocal about her distaste for fashion, coming out recently against the Met Gala. "I guess I should be grateful I was invited or something, but yeah, it felt like punishment. It's not me and I don't like it," she told Howard Stern. "We're dressed up like a bunch of f--kin' assholes."
Did Schumer further her point on TV's most glamorous night? I'll leave that up to you. Designer and proto punk Vivienne Westwood, who has made a career out of being a rabble-rouser, probably loved it; you'll remember Westwood is the one in 1992 who famously showed up to collect her OBE from the Queen at Buckingham Palace without wearing any underwear, and twirled around outside to prove it. She's really the perfect designer for the outspoken actress.
Schumer wasn't the only one to take back the carpet; To the haters on her Monique Lhuillier bustier and pants look, Sarah Hyland told THR, "I love my dress because it's not a dress and pants are f--king awesome!"
It was a wild carpet Sunday night, and tame at the same time; Beyonce, nominated for Lemonade, would have been the fashion diva to beat - had she showed up. Instead, out came the lemonade-colored dresses (Mandy Moore in marigold Prabal Gurung, Ellie Kemper in textured Jenny Packham, Taraji P. Henson in Vera Wang, a rare missed glam slam).
Instead, Sarah Paulson played the diva in a disco ball of a dress with 3D embroidery by Prada (styled by Karla Welch). She also won the Emmy for best lead actress in a limited series.
Priyanka Chopra was the evening's lady in red (there's always at least one) in a classical-looking, expertly pleated custom Jason Wu gown that had shades of Madame Gres. Instead of making a joke out of her princess moment, she embraced it, twirling for the cameras. Couture lover, that's her brand. Chopra was styled by Cristina Ehrlich.
Director Jill Soloway always makes a stylish case for the pants suit (and last night, a fun Gucci printed blouse and high top sneakers). I love that she has a signature look. Accepting her Emmy for Outstanding Directing for a Comedy Series, she offered this rallying cry, "Topple the patriarchy!"
Michelle Dockery played the coquette in a pretty Oscar de la Renta tiered white dress with black outlines. And Julia Louis-Dreyfus (winner of best actress in a comedy series), ever the modernist, wore a Carolina Herrera black dot motif gown with a black patent crisscross on the bodice.
I noticed lots of interesting cutouts on dresses, some that worked better than others. I liked that pregnant Kerry Washington wore that sexy Brandon Maxwell gown with cutouts under the bust. Why not?
Washington underscored a real sense of fashion inclusiveness on the carpet; Christian Siriano, Hollywood's most democratic designer, dressed 9 women, from Leslie Jones in an electric blue superhero-like jumpsuit and cape ("we made it in a day," said Siriano, who pulled it out once again at the last minute for Leslie) to Kathy Bates.
I also got a kick out of watching the pint-sized next gen Stranger Things trio, who chatted stylists and rented tuxedos before the 12-year-old breakout star of Emmys weekend Millie Bobby Brown declared like a pro, "And I'm wearing Valentino Red!"
A pretty sure sign the red carpet will roll on in one form or another.