'Downton Abbey' Recap: Bad Blood

Warning: This recap for Season 6, “Episode Five” of Downton Abbey contains spoilers.

Did we tune into Downton Abbey or a rerun of Ridley Scott’s Alien?

The hospital drama turned bloody — literally — during what may well be the most memorable dinner in Downton history. Not only is there a future prime minister at the table, but Lord Grantham spews blood all over the fine china when his ulcer bursts. The awful incident does reveal one long-kept secret: Mary finally figures out the truth about Marigold’s identity.

Related: ‘Downton Abbey’ Director Talks That Dinner Scene Shocker

Now, a look at what happened with the couples this week:

Robert and Cora
Lord Grantham’s indigestion is getting worse, and it’s not helped by the continuing feud between his wife and mother over the hospital. The Dowager has blackmailed invited the Health Minister, Neville Chamberlain (future Prime Minister), to dinner to persuade him to her side. And even a politician like him is taken aback by the vitriol and acrimony as Violet, Isobel, and Cora snipe at each other.

“Can’t we stop this beastly row?” Robert asks — then vomits blood all over the table and on his wife, who sits across from him.

Everyone is shocked, but Dr. Clarkson is present to tend to him. Cora rushes to his side, as Robert continues to eject blood. “If this is it, just know that I have loved you very, very much,” he chokes out. As gross as the scene is, we couldn’t help but say awwww at his dramatic declaration.

“This isn’t it,” Cora replies firmly.

Robert is rushed to the hospital for an operation, and will recover. Crisis averted. But Lord Grantham will have to take it easy from now on. As Mary tells Tom, they’ll need to take over managing the estate. Lady Mary Crawley’s reign has truly begun.

Mary and Henry
Henry Talbot is back in the area, test driving a new car at a nearby track, and invites Mary and Tom to watch.

Tom teases Mary about her new beau, but she isn’t so sure about their future. “I don’t mean to sound snobbish” — except she really does — ”but I won’t marry down.” Tom argues that a marriage should be balanced, but not in terms of money or position, but in passion and strength, like the relationship he and Sibyl had.

They take in the test race between Henry and Charlie Rogers (those vintage cars are divine), and get a drink with the former in a pub. (Pretty sure Lady Mary Crawley has never been in a pub in her life! The times really are changing.) Mary and Henry flirt and talk about having dinner with their mutual friend, Evelyn Napier (poor guy — always the bridesmaid). Tom says what we’re all thinking: “Why can’t you just say ‘I’d love to spend more time with you’?”

As if Mary would ever make it that easy for any man.

Edith and Bertie
Edith’s got a date! She travels to London to meet up with Bertie, where they walk and talk in the park about his cousin, the Marquess of Hexham. Seems Cousin Peter likes to paint the young men of Tangiers (uh, can we book a ticket for Thomas? Or maybe Cousin Peter should come visit?).

Edith invites Bertie to her flat for a drink (“what a racy plan!”) before he takes her to dinner and dancing. After they share their first, very sweet kiss, Bertie says, “What a relief, I thought I might be pushing my luck.” He doesn’t have much to offer, though, and she’s an earl’s daughter. There’s more to the story, of course, but Bertie has no clue why Edith would reply, “You have a great deal to offer, and I’m not sure I’m worthy of it.” Poor Edith.

Related: The 10 Best #PoorEdith Episodes of ‘Downton Abbey’

Miss Baxter and Mr. Molesley
“Do other butlers have to contend with the police arriving every ten minutes?” Carson asks during this episode, and we have the very same question. Sgt. Willis is back, this time to take Miss Baxter to Peter Coyle’s trial. Mr. Molesley goes with her for support.

But good news, Coyle has decided to plead guilty and Baxter won’t have to testify. She’s a little let down at first by the anti-climatic result, and Mr. Molesley asks, “Shall I go back in and ask him to plead not guilty after all?” Love when Molesley gets cheeky! Let’s cross our fingers, too, that this is the last we see of Sgt. Willis.

Carson and Mrs. Hughes
What happens when two strong-willed, independent people who have never been in a serious relationship get married? Comedy, that’s what.

Mr. Carson has always been set in his ways and he likes things “just so” — and we love him anyway. It should come as no surprise that he’s as dictatorial and perfectionist in his personal life as his professional one. When Mrs. Hughes cooks dinner for them in their cottage, he nitpicks about the cold plates, the dull knife, the choice of bubble and squeak for side dish (yeah, we had to Google it too). Then, he even asks Mrs. Hughes to get some culinary pointers from Mrs. Patmore.

Careful, Charlie, or you’ll be sleeping on the sofa soon!

As for the singletons:

• Daisy: Mr. Mason moves into Yew Tree Farm, and asks Daisy to come live with him. She resists and doesn’t seem to want any of the other servants befriending him. She really is the worst.

• Andy: He volunteers to help Mr. Mason with the physical chores at the farm, especially with raising the pigs, but is dismayed when Mr. Mason gives him some books to read first. Turns out, he can’t read! Thomas comes to the rescue and offers to teach him, even though Andy has been treating him like dirt lately.

This week in Dowager Countess vs. Isobel
We already went over the dinner, but here’s what else went down: The Dowager used knowledge of a youthful prank that Neville Chamberlain and his buddies pulled years ago to compel him to come to Downton.

Unfortunately, the tide has already turned against her, with Dr. Clarkson defecting to Cora’s team. Miss Denker is livid for her sake, and calls the doctor a traitor in the village square. When Violet hears about it, she fires her maid. But Denker blackmails Spratt into changing her mind. Like mistress, like maid!

And after Robert’s ulcer bursts, Cora lays down the law with Violet. The plan to merge the hospitals will move forward. Will the Dowager be able to live with defeat?

Poor Thomas moment: Andy apologizes for being mean to him, so things are looking up there.

Poor Edith moment: Mary overhears a conversation between her mother and grandmother that clues her into Marigold’s identity, and the look on her face is not encouraging. Hell hath no fury like Lady Mary kept out of a secret! This can’t be good for Edith.

Dowager Countess quip of the week: “If I withdrew my friendship from everyone who had spoken ill of me, my address book would be empty.”

Downton Abbey airs Sundays at 9 p.m. on Masterpiece on PBS