30 Rock: 25 Best Lines from "Reaganing" Episode

Shawn Humphrey
Yahoo! Contributor Network
Tina Fey at the premiere of Baby Mama in New York City at the 2008 Tribeca Film Festival. Photographer's blog post about this photo and the scar on Tina Fey's face.

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NBC's 30 Rock aired "Reaganing" on October 28. While not their best episode, it was a great example why even in season five, the show has aged well. All of the main characters were featured, with three distinct plot lines: Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) is having a perfect 24 hours referred to as "Reaganing" in his conservative worldview, and he insists on fixing Liz Lemon's (Tina Fey) problems with her boyfriend. Tracy Jordan (Tracy Morgan) tackles an ad shoot for the Boy's and Girl's Club with predictably messy results. Jenna Maroney (Jane Krakowski) pulls in naive NBC page Kenneth Purcell (Jack McBrayer) for a con game run against a Carvel ice cream store, later adding "TGS with Tracy Jordan" guest Kelsey Grammer.

25 Best Lines

"Like your mouth. It looks like somebody kicked a hole in a bag of flour." Jack's assistant Jonathon (Maulik Pancholy) berating Liz.

"The only other people who've ever done it, Lee Iacocca, Jack Welch and- no judgement- Saddam Hussein." Jack describing "Reaganing" to Liz.

"I have to talk to Rachel Maddow. Only one of us can have this haircut." Jack offering to drop Liz off at Newark Airport on his way to MSNBC.

"... and I just can't turn down community service, because if I do, that judge will make me join the Coast Guard." Tracy insisting he has to do an offered commercial for the Boys and Girls Club of America to Kenneth.

"Well, I also recently received an unexpected honor- from the Carvel Ice Cream corporation." Jenna, trying to compete with Tracy. She pulls out a Free Ice Cream For Life card, having just performed skankily on a Carvel float.

"If I want to see a 50-ft. Spiderman, I'll just go into my rec room, thank you." Tracy, on why he doesn't care for parades.

"When I see you chew your nails like that it's either because you're anxious or handled some ham earlier." Jack expresses concern for Liz while in a limo.

"If I could push a button and five people in the world would die but I'd get free cable for life, I'd do it." Liz in a flashback as Jack notes she is never shy about talking.

"I'm just going to raise the barrier if that's okie-dokie with everyone." Cab driver not wanting to hear about Liz's intimacy issues.

"Scripts get in the way of my process, Shawn. Let's just shoot a hundred of these and see what we get." Tracy tells a director (Seth Kirschner) why he didn't bother to read a one line script sent to him.

Kenneth, shocked that Jenna wants to return an ice cream cake: "I know food's plentiful around here, Miss Maroney, but back home on our pig farm, times are tough. We've had to sell off Sally, Julie, and Poppy." Jenna: "Are those some of your pigs?" *Kenneth pauses* "Yes."

Jack Donaghy, in a flashback sequence. "We are lovers." Liz Lemon: "Oh, that word bums me out unless it's between the words 'meat' and 'pizza'."

"Stop it Jack, stop it! Stop asking about the roller skates!" Jack hits a surprising nerve when quizzing Liz on her intimacy history.

"We're causing a huge traffic jam by getting paid to make dreams. We're the luckiest people on earth. Now somebody get me a Jolt Cola! It does not exist any more!" Tracy reacts to critical direction.

After a complicated, single-shot montage of children doing sports tricks, camera pans on Tracy: "Shirt on or off Shawn?" Director: "ON!" Tracey: "Good note, back to one."

"I don't understand what you're saying, but I like that it has the word 'we' in it!" Kenneth gets excited as Jenna proposes they pull a con game.

"Make way! I'm Reaganing." Jack "fixes" problem with Tracy on set, rushes back to fix Liz's problems.

"Don't you worry. I'm sending you some money so you can get your operation. Now, can you put a human on the phone?" Kenneth calling home to the pig farm.

"One last long grift, huh? Okay. I'm in. But one rule. Anybody gets hurt during the score, we leave them behind to die." Kelsey Grammer, as himself, is recruited to help Jenna and Kenneth with their scam.

Kelsey Grammer: "I would like 21 cakes that read Frajer Reunion, 2010." Carvel employee: "Isn't it Frazier?" Grammer: "No. It's Frajer. And I should know- I'm Frajer."

"FRAJER!" Carvel employee upon opening boxes and finding nothing but newspaper.

"You got a good heart. I hope you get into a car accident some day so I can have it." Jenna gives Kenneth permission to leave the grift business.

"Now there's only one thing left to do. Beat you out of the Best Friends Gang". Kelsey Grammer and Jenna before closing in on Kenneth.

Liz, happy that Jack seems to have found the root of her problems with her boyfriend: "Does this mean I'm fixed?" Jack: "Oh, God no, you've got years of therapy ahead of you, probably electric shock..."

Liz tells Jack he's better than Reagan: "I appreciate that, Lemon, but if you ever speak ill of Reagan again, I will smack those teeth straight."


30 Rock: "Reaganing"