Warning: Armed, Angry and Sitting Next to You

Airplane passengers can get angry fast. Yesterday, a woman pulled out pepper spray to combat her seat neighbor. (Photo: Shotshop GmbH / Alamy)

By Billie Cohen

It’s not terrorism you have to worry about on your next flight. Or crashing. Or pilot error. It’s angry seat mates. Because when humans get upset, they get stupid. And we all know there’s so much that can make you angry on a flight. Even when everything goes right (you find an airfare deal, your flight actually takes off on time), there’s bound to be something to tick you off during your flight. Most of us are satisfied with silently stewing in our seats. But for others, things can get crazy very quickly.

Just yesterday, two women proved that point vividly when they got into a fight on JetBlue flight 960, which landed in JFK from Kingston, Jamaica. When one woman tried to get out of her seat before the plane reached the gate, her seat mate got angry. Pushing ensued, quickly followed by punching, and then, of course the weapons — in this case an eyebrow razor and pepper spray.

How did they even get on the plane with those weapons? Both mace and sharp knives are prohibited as carry-on items by the TSA; they can only be kept in checked baggage — rules reiterated on JetBlue’s own website. But since that JetBlue flight originated in Jamaica, different rules can apply, as they may in any airport outside the US.

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The Airport Authority of Jamaica has yet to respond to my request for comment and explanation, but whatever the reason this oversight happened, it happened. And since we’re all human, it could certainly happen again. I can understand that, and frankly I’m not that worried about it. Anyone can get on a plane with at least three weapons anyway: two fists and poor judgment.

Not only have we seen innumerable drunk and/or entitled celebrities launch into screaming matches with flight attendants (one even allowed her child to pee in an airsickness bag), but we’ve read about seemingly normal people who opened the emergency exit, let their children poop on the seat, and started fights to defend their knees from reclining seats.

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What’s more, I’m continually flummoxed, and not a little frightened, by the things people try to take onto planes. Follow the TSA’s Instagram feed and you will be too. This week alone, they’ve found the following in people’s carry-ons: an inert hand grenade, throwing stars, saws, knives, shotgun shells, and a loaded gun. (Btw, stars, saws, knives, ammunition, and unloaded guns are permitted in checked luggage, just not in carry-ons. Grenades, even inert ones, are a no-no anywhere you pack them.)

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Pepper spray, like the small canister used by one of the JetBlue seat wrestlers, is also allowed in checked baggage only. An eyebrow razor…well, I’m not sure. I don’t even really know what that is. And since the TSA says it’s okay to board with dull rounded knives, I’d guess that a cosmetic knife like that could make it onto most planes pretty easily (though our editor-in-chief recently had to turn over her eyebrow scissors).

So yes, there are fuzzy lines when it comes to security, no matter where in the world you are, and although that’s a little unnerving, I can at least understand it. But I’m just in awe of how quick people are to turn on each other, and how fast small grievances can escalate into smackdowns. And unfortunately, no airport security can screen passengers for anger.

However, no one should get that angry with their seat mates in the first place. After all, it’s not their fault that there’s no room to stretch your legs. It’s the airline’s.

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