For the Love of God, You Do Not Need a Case for Your Apple Watch
Here’s a quiz for all adult human beings who own an Apple Watch:
1) Are you able to walk around this earth without crashing into walls, falling down staircases, or plummeting off cliffs like the Roadrunner?
2) When you get angry, are you able to channel that anger in a positive direction, without smashing your wrist against a metal door?
3) Do you understand that it is a bad idea to try to run over your Apple Watch with a car?
If you answered “yes” to all of those questions, then congratulations: You do not need to buy one of the 18 million cases for the Apple Watch that are now available to you. Save your money. Spend that $20 on a few days of groceries, or a salad in New York City. Donate it to the Clinton Foundation. Whatever. Just don’t waste it on a case.
I am seeing these ugly, superfluous accessories everywhere lately. I understand the impulse behind their manufacture: When a new Apple product launches, you’ve got to try to capitalize on it however you can. Some entrepreneurs created apps; others made replacement watch bands. These business wizards, on the other hand, are trying to convince the brain-dead suckers of the universe that they need a protective cover for a wristwatch.
Of course, you don’t. Your Apple Watch is not in danger of cracks or death blows in the same way that, say, your iPhone is. A phone needs a case because you are constantly transferring it between pocket and hand, or placing it on a table or a countertop or the roof of your car.
Not so for your Apple Watch. It is strapped to your wrist. It is not going to fly away. Putting a case on your watch is like wearing a helmet while you’re watching television: It looks stupid and it’s not protecting anything. Don’t do it.
Not helping: All of these cases look terrible. In addition to being a timepiece and wrist computer, the Apple Watch is also a piece of jewelry. It has been carefully crafted by dozens of highly-compensated designers to enhance your public appearance. And yet Apple Watch cases range in appearance from G.I. Joe fantasy camp to Fisher-Price tummy-time mattress.
Is this an Apple Watch or a wristified Tamagotchi? (Twitter)
Don’t ruin your very expensive and precious Apple Watch with a “Rugged” protective cover. You are not rugged. Nor are you a Looney Tunes character. You are not going to fall off a cliff, and if you do, you will have bigger problems than the condition of your watch screen.
Just wear your Apple Watch as it is meant to be worn: naked, with its body exposed to the elements. Now go enjoy your $20 salad, and your case-free Apple Watch, too.
