Do you see it? Just below the surface, hiding in plain sight?
That's right: The invitation for the Sept. 12 Apple event contains 100 percent real and genuine clues about what is going to be revealed that day at the Steve Jobs Theater. And, if you only know how to look, it's beautiful.
First, let's cover what we already think we know about the big day. The company will likely unveil three new iPhones, including the much-hyped iPhone 8. Pretty amazing, right?
OK, now that we've got that out of the way, it's time to dive into the kind of super secret shit disguised in the above tricolor Apple logo that only your friends who live and breathe that #AppleLife will have been able to spot.
Are you ready? Because it's about to get real.
First, Wall Street Journal tech columnist Joanna Stern tweeted out what we're all thinking. Namely, that the red, white, and blue in the logo doesn't demonstrate a newfound commitment by Apple to manufacture the iPhone 8 in the good ole USA, but rather represents three separate phones.
If you look really closely, and hold your face to your screen like a Magic Eye, you can see three iPhones. pic.twitter.com/xx507Njg3i
— Joanna Stern (@JoannaStern) August 31, 2017
Whoa, right? Just whoa. But it doesn't stop there. No, my friends, that's just the tip of the iceberg.
What if, and stay with me here, that white smudge is not in fact a phone? What if, instead, it represents your willingness to shell out tons of money for what is likely to be a $1,000 smartphone? This is not a crazy as it sounds. I mean, just look at this:
That's clearly a credit card. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
Which, hell yeah, now we're getting somewhere. But even giving this payment Easter egg its proper due, isn't it likely that there are even more juicy nuggets lounging in those pixels — just ripe for the picking? Of course it is. In fact, you can count on it.
— Mehedi Hassan (@mehedih_) August 31, 2017
The above breakdown helps us come to the realization that, in all likelihood, the Apple logo will be on the back on the iPhone 8 — a phone that will have so-called "rounded corners."
We're not sure if Apple meant to give all this away in the event invite, but we can't say we're upset. And even if this was all we could deduce from the invite, we'd be happy campers. Thankfully, however, there's so much more.
The rabbit hole beckons, and we'd never be able to forgive ourselves if we didn't tumble right down it.
What if the blurry nature of the (definitely) iPhones hiding in the logo actually prove the iPhone 8 will be flexible? Hey, it's totally possible. In fact, not only possible, but certain. What's more, the invite casually lets slip that this is the "first-ever event" to be held at the Steve Jobs Theater. That's right, ladies and gents, as one insightful tweeter pointed out that means the Sept. 12 presentation will be a "BIG DEAL."
But push up that dropped jaw, because we're not done yet. Applying what is surely some Photoshop-filter magic to remove distortion, we're able to see that the invite also includes a HomePod. And a hand.
— Alex H (@MetalHaze) August 31, 2017
Does this mean that the iPhone 8 will sync with the smart speaker, all with the ease of a simple spank? You better believe it does, and we couldn't be more here for it.
Now, we know what you're thinking: This deep dive into the secrets of Apple's Sept. 12 event has been wonderful, revealing, and insightful, but you want to know where you can find even more. Thankfully, there's a subreddit for that. Oh, also, there are plenty of brave publications that have made a name for themselves doing this very thing — hopefully they'll be back at it in short order.
Until then, let's all sit back, loosen our focus, drop a little acid in honor of the late Steve Jobs, and gaze at the invite until we see it for what it really is: a treasure trove of definitely authentic Apple secrets.