By Michael A. Prospero
While the biggest trends at this year’s CES were wearables, curved TVs and smarter homes and cars, there was plenty of room in Las Vegas for wonderfully weird gizmos. We’re talking about projectors on wheels, iPhone tasers, and high-tech thighmasters. We even found a 3D food printer. Behold the wildest and wackiest products at CES 2014.
Even Joan Crawford wasn’t this creepy. The Sen.se Mother connects to your home network and keeps track of what you eat, steps you take and where your kids are, all the while looking at you with its green glowing eyes. The Mother is available for preorder for $222, and is expected to ship in February.
Yellow Jacket iPhone Taser Case
This one’s all the buzz. Built into this unassuming iPhone case is a taser that delivers 650,000 volts to any would-be assailant. Set to launch in February, it will cost $149. Just make sure they’re legal where you live.
The keyboard for aspiring accordion players, the TrewGrip is a Bluetooth keyboard that attaches to your smartphone or small tablet, but has its keys on the backside, making you type by feel. According to the company, the reach-around TrewGrip is more ergonomic and allows for faster typing than a traditional keyboard. That may be, but we might stick with Ryan Seacrest’s Typo case.
Touchscreen-Friendly Elektra Nails
Ladies, don’t you just hate it when your fingernails get in the way of your smartphone? Elektra’s glue-on nails can be detected by a touchscreen display, letting you type messages with stylus-like accuracy. Even better, you can paint them any color you choose. Take that, Lee press-ons!
More: Best of CES 2014 Awards
Singing, Dancing Plush Obama Doll
Meet the gift for the tea partier who has everything. Plug Barack into a phone or other music device, and watch him dance and sing your favorite tunes. Better, this toy made by Plush Pals can also be used as a speakerphone, giving new meaning to the phrase “the President’s on the line.”
Kooky Keecker Projector on Wheels
Now why didn’t we think of this? The Kooky Keecker is a 1080p projector on wheels, so you can take your shows wherever you go. Not only can you watch movies using this $5,000 projector, but you can also play games, as it runs Android 4.2. You can drive this gadget around using an Android app, or even have it automatically follow you. That’s one way to cast a huge shadow.
Inmotion SCV Personal Transporter
The Segway never caught on, but that hasn’t stopped others from trying. Inmotion’s SCV R1 personal transporter is about half the size and half the price of Steve Wozniak’s preferred mode of transportation, and we dig the Lamborghini-style tail lights. We had such a fun time wheeling around on the SCV, we didn’t want to stop.
Pay attention, Suzanne Somers. Keep your thighs toned by squeezing the Tao WellShell between your hands or legs; this squishable fitness gadget measures the force of your press, and records it on a smartphone app. Unlike the ThighMaster of old, the WellShell is much more portable, and can be used for a number of different isometric exercises.
ChefJet 3D Food Printer
Cooking your own food is so last year. 3D System’s ChefJet is a printer that can create edible three-dimensional objects out of sugar, from candy and cake toppings to decorations and pretty much anything you can make on a 3D printer. But before you let all that sugar rush to your head, know that the ChefJet costs $5,000.
PrioVR Gaming Body Suit
Resistance is futile. Once you strap into Yei Technology’s full-body Prio Virtual Reality gaming accessory, your PlayStation 4 controller will seem like an Atari joystick. That’s because this suit, which covers your arms and legs, translates your movements into whatever character you’re playing in a game, making for a much more immersive experience. The cost of this awesomeness? $499.
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