How My Friends’ Wedding Turned Out to Be the Best Birthday Party I’ve Had
Well, at least she’s wearing fabulous shoes. (Photo: Trunk Archive)
My birthday comes around every year at that perfect time at the end of June when summer has just started. It’s always just hot and sunny enough — perfect beach weather … or, as I found out when I got older, wedding weather. Yep. My birthday is also right in the middle of wedding season, which wasn’t an issue for me until two of my college friends, we’ll call them Jordan and Douglas, announced their wedding day, which just so happened to be on the same date I would be turning 28 years old.
“Now I’ll never be able to forget your anniversary,” I joked after they told me when they were getting married. Of course, I was excited to see two of my closest friends finally tying the knot, but I couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment that my birthday would be overshadowed by a much more important event. I was happy for Jordan and Douglas, but sad that I wouldn’t be able to plan my day. That Ziggy Marley/Maxi Priest concert on Coney Island? Forget about it. Brunch at the Cecil? Not happening. An afternoon puffing hookah at La Marina, in Washington Heights? Maybe next year.
I managed to take a single selfie on my birthday this year. (Photo: Courtesy of Jihan Forbes)
But besides the fact that I wouldn’t have the degree of control I wanted over my birthday activities, I was also sad that I wouldn’t be able to share the day with a large chunk of my close friends. I met Jordan and Douglas in college, so I would be spending the day with people I was close to, but all of my childhood and post-college friends wouldn’t at the wedding.
I also felt a bit uncomfortable even acknowledging my birthday. After all, birthdays come around every 12 months. Who cares if I’m a year older when two people I care about dearly are making their relationship official? I decided to keep things extremely low-key this year. I treated myself to a cute outfit, and that was it. I didn’t want any presents, and I didn’t even really want people to mention my birthday. I just wanted to enjoy Douglas and Jordan’s day, cry a few tears of joy, gorge myself on wedding desserts, and dance the night away with the couple and some of our friends.
I’m not sure what I was expecting of the weekend, but it turned out to be nothing I could have imagined. The ceremony was, of course, beautiful and finished without a dry eye in the joint. The reception was tastefully done, in a spacious, rustically decorated barn across the road from where the ceremony was held. During cocktail hour I sat in the grass, munching fancy meats and sipping wine with my college friends against a backdrop of the Catskills’ hills and mountains. Sitting there, I realized that, though I wasn’t doing exactly what I would have planned to do on my birthday, I couldn’t think of a better way to spend my 28th.
The gorgeous scene at the wedding. (Photo: Courtesy of Jihan Forbes)
We live in a world where we’re bombarded with images of hatred and anger, driven by fear, greed, ignorance, and misunderstanding. But that weekend, all the horrible things about the world seemed to melt away. We guests barely had any cellphone service the whole time, so instead of sitting around checking our Instagram feeds or choosing the perfect Snapchat filter, we actually spoke to one another. Sure, we took pictures, but we didn’t take them to show everyone on social media what an amazing time we were having — we took pictures because we wanted to remember the day we were all together as friends, celebrating and joyful. It was a reminder that despite what was going on beyond our mountainous weekend paradise, there is still love in the world.
If I’m being honest, this wedding was one of the best birthdays I’ve had. Seeing my friends filled with so much joy and excitement for their futures was the greatest birthday gift I could get. And the added bonus? Years of joint anniversary/birthday parties are ahead, and I can’t wait for us all to keep celebrating.
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