Caroline de Maigret on Her Man, Moderation, and Living Au Naturel

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Photography Sunny Shokrae

Caroline de Maigret is easily the chicest French woman you have never heard of. The 39-yer-old parisienne is an aristocrat (The granddaughter of a prince and the daughter of a count, to be exact), a model for Chanel, a muse to Mario Testino, and a face of Lancome. She and her partner Yarol Poupaud have an indie label called Bonus Tracks Records as well as a 9-year-old son, Anton. It goes without saying that her Instagram is to die for.

We met up with her in her sunny, designer clothes-strewn corner room in the Bowery Hotel in New York to discuss her latest project, a book called How to Be Parisian Wherever You Are: Love, Style, and Bad Habits. It’s a style guide written along with her friends Anne Berest, a writer, Sophie Mas, a film producer, and Audrey Diwan, a director. Instead of just consisting of lots of glossy photos with some forgotten text, Maigret’s book goes beyond the typical and is a rare literary musing on just what makes French women so alluring—with some great portraits, recipes, and words of wisdom.

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As they write, “It is almost impossible to resolve the great mystery of what is natural, Because, in fact, nothing is natural. Parisiennes will have you believe that they are born with perfect skin and delightfully messy hair. That these ‘natural’ attributes are a heritage that cannot be explained. They are all lying.”

MM: So tell me how this all came about.

CM: We were all traveling quite a lot and asked tips about our style and our attitude, our love lives, how we do as parents—three out of four of us are mothers, but I’m the one still with my man.

MM: I love that you call him your man. Are you two ever going to get married? Is that so American of me to ask?

CM: It stresses me out. I’m so independent I feel like it will break something if we do. I feel like I’m married for life, but I also feel like I can still run away. This way, we both have to fight to stay togther. But if not being married ever makes him sad, I will do it.

MM: Okay, so people were asking you all about your secrets?

CM: It was interesting because it was stuff that was completely instinctive for us. So we decided to explore why we approach beauty differently and how much of a cliché those French ideas were. Of course it’s more of a global woman now, the French woman, but we still have those differences.

MM: Why do we keep looking to the French as this ideal woman?

CM: Maybe you take us as example because we gave up on the idea of looking. Maybe that’s what’s cool, not running after something that doesn’t exist. There is no Prince Charming. Not how life is, and it’s much more fun once you give up all those demands.

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MM: So you and the co-authors, you’re all close friends?

CM: We have known each other for years. People have pointed out that we’re all brunettes as a reproach, like marketing-wise, I didn’t do it properly. The idea was to have enough women to gather all different neuroses: one is funny, one is calm, one is jealous…

MM: Which one are you?

CM: I’m in love, I’m hyperactive, quite confident, independent. I’m not gonna tell you my neuroses! [Laughs.]

MM: Tell me about how you got into modeling.

CM: Grew up in Paris, studied French literature at the Sorbonne and then left. People were asking me to model and it seemed like a cool way to make money and to travel. I thought, while I do that maybe I’ll have an epiphany. I came to New York right away and was hanging out with a lot of artists. I understood the strangeness of being a model, being quite passive. I do work, but I’m not creating the idea. You make a certain amount of money, which can be a bit strange compared to artists who work their asses off and don’t succeed. And then I start sponsoring my musician friends.

MM: What kind of music are you into?

CM: Elvis is my god. The Black Keys, Jack White, all this rock ‘n’ roll and garage with blues roots. I decided to go back home because America didn’t need another indie label but France did. I needed to go back to my roots. I was doing a lot of soundtracks. I was nominated for the best soundtrack of the year at the French version of the Oscars and Karl Lagerfeld called me up and said, ‘Do you want to do my show?’” That was three years ago. It was odd to start again at 35 years old, but I did it and then people started calling me again.

MM: What don’t American women understand about French style?

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CM: We take a lot of time pretending to achieve something in order to pretend we didn’t take any time doing it: half an hour to do makeup that looks like it takes two minutes. Eat with moderation, dress with moderation, have only one strong piece in your outfit rather than all of it, don’t wear logos. Same for makeup: accentuate just one thing. We’re not into showing off. You want to be loved more as an intellectual in a way. It would be hard for a Parisian to have a blowout everyday, that’s losing one hour to do something futile. Maybe she was really watching tv for that hour, but she pretends she was reading. It’s more of a game, more of a mystery. Nobody needs to know you’re going to the gym or tht you had your eyelids done instead of going to the south of France. It’s not that French women don’t get fat, or don’t do surgery, it’s just we don’t talk about. That’s the secret to the mystery of the Parisian woman. It’s the same for parenting.

MM: In the US, do you walk down the street want to do makeunders on everyone?

CM: In America, it feels like there’s always two women. There’s work clothes and then sweatpants, no heels. In France, we never change clothes, we’re the same woman at home, at work, picking up the kids from school. We go out at night the same way, maybe with a bit of eyes and a jacket and off you go. So I guess that’s why we’re effortless. Be ready to meet the man of your life around the corner. Not like, ‘Aw damn, I wish I saw him yesterday when I was wearing a better outfit.’” And be ready in your mind. The woman you are is what you have in your mind—that’s what I’m trying to teach to my kid. If you meet your favorite actor, you can teach them something, you can have a conversation. You’re bringing something to the table.

Publicist: Shouldn’t you talk about beauty?

MM: I really do want to hear your routine.

CM: [Laughs.] It’s about being elegant and taking care of yourself. My main trick is to really clean my face deeply clean every night with Lancome’s Cleanser Eau Fraiche Douceur. I like Eau de Caudalie, it wakes me up and tightens the pores. I take magnesium and iron vitamins every morning. I do feel less tired than before. But I am the perfect victim for those things, I use SPF 50 everyday—I like La Roche Posay. During the weekend, I like do hair and face masks at the same time.

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MM: And makeup?

CM: A lot of mascara! Black at night for a deeper look and brown during the day. Hypnose from Lancome is thick and gives you a lot of lashes. I use YSL’s Touche Eclat, and a little pink blush—brown has a tendency to make me look older now. An eyeliner sometimes and balm on my lips. And then at night, only mascara and red lips—L’Absolu Rouge.