This body-positive model has us thinking twice about the word “sexy”

Aly Horne
Updated
This body-positive model has us thinking twice about the word “sexy”
This body-positive model has us thinking twice about the word “sexy”

We’re obviously here for body positivity, which is why we totally love Instafamous Megan Jayne’s perspective on all things body. Her Instagram, bodyposipanda, has over 500,000 followers who, like us, love her honest posts and total self-love.

As women living in a society that feels entitled to policing and evaluating our worth based on our bodies, it’s so important to have role models like Megan who don’t subscribe to that toxic culture. Having recovered from anorexia, we extra respect Megan for being so open and honest on her Instagram — and we’re sure she’s inspiring girls who struggle with body image issues to overcome similar obstacles.

Her most recent post examining her feelings toward the word ‘sexy’ is especially on-point, and we’re definitely going to take her perspective to heart.

I've realised lately that I don't like the word sexy. For most of my years I've believed that sexy has to look a certain way. Sexy has to be thin. Sexy has to be flattering. Sexy has to emphasise the 'right' places and hide the 'wrong' ones. Sexy has to be catered towards the male gaze. Most of all, sexy has to be about being sexually appealing, being a commodity and selling yourself well. So when people comment here calling me sexy, I cringe. Because I'm not here for that. Not anymore. I spent a lot of years thinking that I had to be someone else's definition of sexy to be worth something, and I tried so hard to find validation in their gaze. I saw myself as that commodity and I did everything I could to sell myself well. Not anymore. I'm done playing by those rules that kept me small and made me think my only value was being appealing to someone else, fulfilling someone else's idea of what I should be for them, do for them. From now on when I think about the word sexy I won't think that I have to twist and contort myself into an image like the one on the left in order to be worthy. Because sexiness should be about joy, and freedom, and confidence in exactly who you are. It shouldn't be about pleasing anyone but yourself. So guess what? You can wear lacey lingerie and feel sexy. But you can also wear massive knickers and old sports bras and feel sexy. Or you can say to hell with sexy and find your power in other things. Whatever you do, make sure it's for you. Fuck spending your life trying to fit what anyone else thinks you should be. Lingerie on the left by @dearscantilly

A photo posted by Megan Jayne Crabbe

(@bodyposipanda) on Jan 24, 2017 at 12:41pm PST

In her post, she states:

“I spent a lot of years thinking that I had to be someone else’s definition of sexy to be worth something, and I tried so hard to find validation in their gaze. I saw myself as that commodity and I did everything I could to sell myself well. Not anymore.”

If I'd seen this picture a few years ago my brain would have instantly screamed ❗LOVE HANDLES LUMPY THIGHS BARE FACE CELLULITE DELETE DELETE DELETE❗ Today my first thought when I see this picture is those flowers are literally flying towards my face HOW COOL IS THAT! And all of those other things don't even come into consideration. I'm not picking apart every 'flaw' I see. I'm not frantically planning the next diet. I'm not burying myself in shame for not fitting some impossible ideal that I was never meant to be. I see joy, I see flower explosions, and I see me, and I am good enough as I am (and p.s... that means you are too!). This photo is part of an amazing project I got to do called @_thebeautyofimperfection, there are more pictures and an interview on their page! Photos by the fantastic @beckylongphotography

A photo posted by Megan Jayne Crabbe

(@bodyposipanda) on Jan 15, 2017 at 12:38pm PST

We totally respect women reclaiming the word sexy to fit their own, healthier definition — but we’re also totally here for Megan’s rejection of the word and of the idea that her body is a commodity for other people’s consumption. To quote her again:

“You can say to hell with sexy and find your power in other things. Whatever you do, make sure it’s for you.”

We’ve definitely found a new #shero in Megan.