Grossest Real Life Parenting Moments
Christine Coppa’s son, Jack, getting down and dirty with the dogs in the pee and poop soaked dog park. (Cringe) (Photo: Christine Coppa)
Admit it, moms and dads: Parenting can be gross. For me, it started when my son was a day old, peeing all over me — a perfect, little golden arch — every time I opened up his diaper. Pee in my hair, in my face, and on my shirt. As he got older, I’ve been asked to “get that crunchy booger out of my nose,” or “hold this worm — that I think — is dead.”
Recently, I cringed watching my son roll around at the dog park with his puppy.
“Do you realize dogs pee and poop in here?” I asked him, rolling my eyes. He stripped down before entering the house and jumped right in the shower. “Just stay in there,” I kept saying, when he declared he was done.
Here, other parents polled on Facebook confess to their grossest parenting moments:
Mommy’s poop Picasso! (Photo: Sheri Salamanca)
“I caught my daughter finger-painting the coffee table with poop from her diaper.” —Sheri Salamanca
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“My child uses my t-shirt as a napkin and tissue pretty regularly. I remember a day at the park I had a mix of boogers and ketchup on my shirt.” —Tamern C.
“When my 3-year-old daughter peed in my bed — I was so tired — I just threw a couple of bath towels down and told her to go back to sleep, now. The warm, pee smell the next morning was not a pleasant wakeup call. The forever yellow stain on my mattress isn’t fun either.” —Maria L.
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“We have a really nice community pool in our town. The shallow baby pool is great for letting my 2-year-old twins splash and play. There’s a rule that all babies in the pool need to wear swim diapers and a rubber pair of undies over it — then the swimsuit. I guess one mom didn’t get the memo. I still see those brown balls floating around. The lifeguards blew the whistle and the pool had to be drained. —Heather B.
Photo: Stocksy
“My children are notorious for destroying the backseat of my car. Half-empty juice boxes, crusty sippy cups from last month caked in Gold Fish crumbs. Melted, sticky ice cream and sprinkles when I let them sit in the hatchback. Sand from five summers ago. Warm finger prints all over the windows. But the best is always when my potty-in-training daughter pees in her car seat and soaks it. I have an unlimited car wash pass.” —Jake D.
“Combing lice and nits out of my kid’s hair was my breaking point. I drank a lot of vodka that evening.” —Sharon R.
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“I heard my son dry heaving in the middle of the night over the monitor and ran into his room. He went for it, so all I could do was cup my hands. I ended up with an overflowing pile of chunky, thick vomit in my hands — held out like a peace offering. Two years later, when there’s any talk of getting sick or throwing up, he looks at me and says, ‘But you’ll catch it for me, right?’” —Jennifer O’Neill, Yahoo Parenting Writer
Photo courtesy of Rob Meyers: Daddy his daughters one of which was the sippy cup culprit.
“My family of four came home from a nice, relaxing vacation, but as soon as we opened the front door we were confronted with a horrendous smell. I sniffed my way into the kitchen where I found a sippy cup filled with milk that had taken the form of chunky yogurt.”—Rob Meyers
Don’t be shy, readers! Yahoo Parenting wants to hear your grossest parenting moment in the comments section.
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