Stephen Colbert Explains How He's Been Quietly Trolling Trump Every Night For 5 Months
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“Late Show” host Stephen Colbert on Monday night came clean about something viewers have noticed: He hasn’t said a certain name on the air since November. Specifically, the name of ex-President Donald Trump.
“I’m not trying to scrub him out,” Colbert said. “It’s just that legend has it, now that he’s out of office, if you say his name three times, he appears in your bathroom mirror and then uses your toilet while complaining that it’s low flush.”
Colbert stopped using Trump’s name after he falsely declared victory on Nov. 6.
“I think I’ve paid my dues in that regard,” Colbert said.
So, he looked for ways around it.
“Usually, I call him ‘the former president’ but that gives him dignity ― and me flashbacks,” he said.
But now Colbert’s stuck and he wants help finding a new name for the old president.
“I’m looking for a reliable substitute for his name,” Colbert said. “Maybe I should just call him, y’know, ‘Melania’s husband,’ or ‘Jeff Epstein’s dance partner’ or something really insulting, like ‘Don Jr.’s father.’”
Colbert asked viewers to offer suggestions on Twitter using the hashtag #HeWhoShallBeNamed and they delivered:
Voldemoron. @colbertlateshow #hewhoshallbenamed
— Susie (@ponyace) April 13, 2021
Mr. One Term Insurrectionist 💩
#HeWhoShallBeNamed pic.twitter.com/oopxJqm0Y5— Ozzy 🇺🇸 (@geminigod) April 13, 2021
Use his own kryptonite. Call him "Obama's Successor."#HeWhoShallBeNamed
— Nothing to see here... keep moving (@martianpete) April 13, 2021
I personally like Biden’s term, “The Former Guy.”
Can be abbreviated TFG.
Also can mean “That F***ing Guy.”#TheFormerGuy #HeWhoShallBeNamed— Nightowl (@Nightow10218300) April 13, 2021
Someone wrote something like “Trumplestiltskin” and it made me giggle! I vote for that or what about “Trump-demic”? @colbertlateshow #hewhoshallbenamed https://t.co/od1PPprCTB
— Laurie L. (@ljlapple) April 13, 2021
#HeWhoShallBeNamed - “Spamelton” pic.twitter.com/FSbNQFrTbw
— Limousine Liberal Socialist Hypocritical Asshole (@JarankaK) April 13, 2021
#hewhoshallbenamed
THE MAD KINGPIN pic.twitter.com/wrZTDw93ai— papa g (@felchismo) April 13, 2021
@colbertlateshow #HeWhoShallBeNamed
I've been calling IT "IT" for 5 years. IT fits. pic.twitter.com/Xt1nzRlZgM— Michael Catalano (@AAARCHER1959) April 13, 2021
#HeWhoShallBeNamed This.... As long as John or HBO has not trademarked it https://t.co/8zIZE8XkNC pic.twitter.com/S1mzuQGQNo
— Colin 🐎 (@colinL_nerd2b) April 13, 2021
Big Guy Small Hands #HeWhoShallBeNamed pic.twitter.com/o2fjQsGewr
— Mike G (@Base_206) April 13, 2021
#hewhoshallbenamed Well I mean, I have new favorite hand soap.... pic.twitter.com/T9mMscrZom
— Alyssa (@lyssaturek) April 13, 2021
Unemployed
— Cat (@cat42205198) April 13, 2021
This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.