If Olivier Giroud is maturing 'like fine wine' what does that make Cristiano Ronaldo?

Olivier Giroud knows that you cannot compare yourself to fine wine. That sort of comparison is best left to others.

Conveniently, Giroud’s friends have told him this is how he is maturing, and seeing the former Arsenal and Chelsea dreamboat move past Thierry Henry as France’s all-time leading goalscorer it is difficult to disagree.

 “It means a lot to be next to Thierry Henry on the national team top scorer sheet,” Giroud said After France’s World Cup round of 16 victory over Poland. “It is unbelievable and we couldn’t hope for a better start at the World Cup.

Giroud is becoming one of football’s survivors and has no imminent plans to call last orders on his career. “I play football until my body allows me. I’m a competitor and I’m very passionate and still very hungry.

“As long as I feel good, I will do my best for the team to reach our target and tonight I feel very good. Like some friends said ‘like fine wine’."

Not knowing much about wine, it is difficult to be any more specific about the Giroud comparison. Which French wine is permanently underrated and also handsome? Answers on a postcard (or in the comments).

In the meantime, some other nominations for footballers and the drinks they are most similar to:

Gareth Bale: milk

Strong, if a bit bland. Goes very wrong very quickly when past its sell by date. Ian Rush likes it.

Lionel Messi: craft beer

Obviously amazing, but you sometimes wish earnest men would stop telling you this so frequently.

Sergio Busquets: Cava

A decent Spanish alternative to something other European nations have traditionally done better.

Cristiano Ronaldo: cognac

Enjoyed by sociopaths wearing excellent suits but actually quite difficult to stomach.

Erling Haaland: absinthe

Absolutely terrifying, best not to mess with.

Eden Hazard: Aperol spritz

Exciting and was absolutely ubiquitous a few years ago, but its moment has passed now.

Kevin De Bruyne: Bailey’s

Smooth, even its rivals must concede it is delicious, but surprisingly dangerous over prolonged periods.

David Beckham: mead

So saccharine as to be almost sickly and best left in the past.

Mario Balotelli: Chardonnay

Became a cliché to like, now a cliché to dislike. Its defenders claim it’s misunderstood.

James Milner: tap water

Leaves next to no impression but is entirely necessary.