Guest Opinion: KO'd by COVID, Broadway tries to get up off the mat
For years, Professor Harold Hill has been telling residents of River City that "Trouble" begins with a capital "T," which rhymes with "P" and that stands for pool. But then his misguided musical alphabet went viral and The Music Man, the quintessential poseur/predator, fell victim himself to a gloomy spell that translated globally: The real trouble, he discovered, begins with "C" and ends in "D."
And at that, Hill and a host of other Broadway characters took an up-to two-year intermission, thanks to the transcontinental transmission of COVID, which had more K.O. power than any critic: The pandemic proved to be the ultimate pan, closing shows one after the other on (and off-) Broadway.
But if some thought the disease would spell the end of Broadway, well, Hill and others have helped change their tune: He's back on Broadway as are many of his theatrical cohorts whose shows had to hightail it to the hinterlands. After two years, the Big Apple, a little bruised and bumpy, is almost next to normal, demonstrating the show must go on — with changes.
What kind? It all begs the question for those seeking a silver bullet to save the season:
Who was that masked man?
Well, it was…me. And as I attended a Saturday matinee of The Music Man at the Winter Garden Theatre in New York, I sat amid a sea of other masked musical mavens — men, women and kids — en mufti, in guises as effective as Hill's (the marvelous Hugh Jackman) covering up his gift of grift on stage.
As alluring as the family-friendly show was, the real drama drifted offstage, with a series of serious rules and regulations employed to constrain the virulent disease that has punched the ticket of so many on Broadway and beyond.
Before entering the theater, ticket-holding patrons had to show proof of up-to-date vaccinations and government or school-issued identifications, a pandemic package of safety that included the aforementioned masks, which had to be worn inside.
And Broadway means business: An usher holding a "Mask Up" placard was a veritable sign of the times greeting those finding their seats.
That covers the more selfish among theatergoers who wanted to take selfies without their masks. A gentleman a few seats away doffed his coverup for a selfie, only to be advised immediately by an usher to put it back on. (It was hard to tell if the usher was smiling when he said it; he did have a mask on after all.)
And if Broadway seems a bit out of the picture for those seeking entertainment these days, there's always off Broadway — as in way off Broadway, some 90 miles away. Both the Bristol Riverside Theater and New Hope's Bucks County Playhouse have full seasons with their own cautionary tales: According to their websites, BRT currently offers a mask option while requiring full vaccination and identification proof or a recent negative COVID test, while the Playhouse is currently mandating masks with no proof of vaccination asked for. (Theatergoers should check the sites or call the theaters in case there are changes.)
Back on Broadway, not everyone need bring an N95 to 51st Street: Performers mingle on stage without them and even canoodling can't concede to COVID: When Hill and Marian the Librarian (Sutton Foster) finally embrace on stage, sealing the deal with a kiss, it was such a moment of celebration that the audience could have been forgiven had they ripped off their masks and thrown them in the air. (Well, maybe not forgiven; rules are rules, and no one did that.)
(It should be noted that the two stars have had star-crossed problems during the run. Both came down with COVID early in the show's engagement and followed CDC protocols in dealing with the disease.)
However, not all stage stars eschew masks: The Phantom of the Opera started wearing one on Broadway 34 years ago, and continues to this day. But it doesn't play out problem-free on stage: Indeed, the Phantom must face the only recognized anti-masker on Broadway as Christine tries to rip it off his face every performance. (That is not the music of the night audiences hear; it is his scream.)
Broadway's Spring awakening this season is a heroic encore that is not out-of-place: After all, what other performing art has as its iconic symbol the masks of comedy and tragedy?
Comedy tonight? After two years, cautious theatergoers seem ready to have some fun again as the industry's COVID protocols themselves are in the midst of evolving and easing up. (Best to contact the theater for any changes in rules.)
Curtain up — and, for now, masks, too.
Michael Elkin is a playwright, theater critic and novelist. He lives in Abington.
This article originally appeared on Bucks County Courier Times: Guest Opinion: KO'd by COVID, Broadway tries to get up off the mat
