Grandfathers can have just as much influence on their grandchildren as grandmothers

After last week's article on the evolution of the grandmother role, I anticipated that I might hear from some grandpas. And I did. So this is a follow-up for the men.

I'm so tempted to stereotype the grandfather role, and I know it is not 100% accurate, but I think it applies to a majority. Did anyone ever write a song about "Over the river and through the woods to grandfather's house we go?"

For heaven's sake, even the horse knew the way to grandmother's house! Lydia Maria Child wrote the poem in 1844, and it was later put to music. And it is a familiar tune around Thanksgiving and Christmas.

It's clear that there are a variety of grandpa roles, just like grandmas. They can be the doting PaPa who plays catch in the yard or the babysitter/day care provider. They can even be the sit-on-the-ground Candyland grandpas.

I'm darn sure there are the boardroom, businessmen grandfathers that have very little time or inclination to play the role.

I would wager that, on the whole, there is a lot less pressure on the men to engage in the grandparent role. Men seem to have the choice, and quite frankly, if they do step up, they are admired and applauded for their efforts.

There can be a lot of guilt among the women about not doing enough or being enough for the children or the grandchildren. The men might be remiss, but I doubt they feel guilty because there is no comparable benchmark.

I know there are many exceptions, but on the whole, men are off the hook. I have an example in my own family where my brother-in-law has become deeply attached to his great-grandchildren. We call him Uber PaPa because he is the daily chauffeur to and from school with frequent side trips to Dairy Queen on the way home!

So naturally, he's become the favorite! Everyone in our family looks at him as a hero — not sure it would be the same if my sister were doing the same thing.

So, in conclusion, I have the same thoughts for grandfathers. You can be a significant influencer for these little ones. With your wisdom and experience, you have a great deal to offer them — playing catch in the yard or in the boardroom!

Oh, FYI, the joke's on me. As I was Googling the history of the poem "Over the River and Through the Woods," I learned that in the 1844 original version, they were going to grandfather's house!

So, whoever changed the words down through the decades knew who was doing all the preparations for the holidays!

Find Connie’s book, “Daily Cures: Wisdom for Healthy Aging,” at www.justnowoldenough.com.

This article originally appeared on Topeka Capital-Journal: Over the river … and into your grandchildren's hearts