Funny Love Quotes That We Can All Relate To

Southern Living Editors
·4 min read

NBC/Getty Images

If you've ever been in love, you know that it's not as perfect as it seems in books and movies. That's not to say there aren't perfect moments in real-life love, but love is messy, weird, difficult, and oftentimes very funny. These funny love quotes are the most relatable thing you'll read all day. If you're looking for the perfect Valentine's Day Instagram caption or a text to send your partner that will make them laugh, look no further than these funny quotes about love that are all too true. Valentine's Day can get a bit sappy, so these quotes are the perfect way to lighten things up a bit. These funny quotes for Valentine's Day will put a lighthearted spin on a holiday that shouldn't be taken too seriously. Make your partner, family, friends, and social media followers laugh with a funny quote about love this Valentine's Day.

Funny Love Quotes

"It wasn't love at first sight. It took a full five minutes." Lucille Ball

"It wasn't love at first sight. It took a full five minutes." Lucille Ball
"It wasn't love at first sight. It took a full five minutes." Lucille Ball

"If you text "I love you" and the person writes back an emoji - no matter what that emoji is they don't love you back" Chelsea Peretti

"If you text "I love you" and the person writes back an emoji - no matter what that emoji is they don't love you back" Chelsea Peretti
"If you text "I love you" and the person writes back an emoji - no matter what that emoji is they don't love you back" Chelsea Peretti

"My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me." Garry Shandling

"My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me." Garry Shandling
"My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me." Garry Shandling

"It's fun to complain with someone. Nothing brings us together more than complaining about other people. That might be the thing that holds us together more than anything." Lew Schneider

"True love is singing karaoke ‘Under Pressure' and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part." Mindy Kaling

"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." Charles M. Schulz, creator of Peanuts

"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." Charles M. Schulz, creator of Peanuts
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt." Charles M. Schulz, creator of Peanuts

"Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family." Chelsea Handler

"Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X rays, but you know it's there." George Burns

"I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?" Jean Illsley Clarke

"A guy knows he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days." Tim Allen

"A guy knows he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days." Tim Allen
"A guy knows he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days." Tim Allen

"As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice. You can either be right, or you can be happy." Ralphie May

Funny Love Quotes About Marriage

"Whatever you look like, marry a man your own age—as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight." Phyllis Diller

"Whatever you look like, marry a man your own age—as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight." Phyllis Diller
"Whatever you look like, marry a man your own age—as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight." Phyllis Diller

"Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are." Will Ferrell

"Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are." Will Ferrell
"Before you marry a person you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are." Will Ferrell

"My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years, and not once have we ever had an argument serious enough to mention the word ‘divorce.' ‘Murder,' yes, but ‘divorce,' never." Jack Benny

"My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years, and not once have we ever had an argument serious enough to mention the word ‘divorce.' ‘Murder,' yes, but ‘divorce,' never." Jack Benny
"My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years, and not once have we ever had an argument serious enough to mention the word ‘divorce.' ‘Murder,' yes, but ‘divorce,' never." Jack Benny

"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." Rita Rudner

"I was ready to get married nine years before my wife was. It was only later I realized that she was using all those years to train me. And that's why I know she will never leave me. She doesn't have that kind of time to train somebody else." Steve Skrovan

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery." Erma Bombeck

"Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner." Jerry Seinfeld

"Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner." Jerry Seinfeld
"Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need ten years before you can call yourself a beginner." Jerry Seinfeld

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight dinner, soft music, and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays." Henry Youngman

Funny Love Quotes with Unknown Origins

"A good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."

"A good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."
"A good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."

"Love is grand. Divorce is a hundred grand."

"Love thy neighbor, just watch out for thy husband."

"The four most important words in any marriage—I'll do the dishes."

"The four most important words in any marriage—I'll do the dishes."
"The four most important words in any marriage—I'll do the dishes."

"Love is spending the rest of your life you want to kill and not doing it because you'd miss them."

"Love is spending the rest of your life you want to kill and not doing it because you'd miss them."
"Love is spending the rest of your life you want to kill and not doing it because you'd miss them."

"You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's your common sense leaving your body."

"They say true love hides in every corner. I must be walking in circles."

"They say true love hides in every corner. I must be walking in circles."
"They say true love hides in every corner. I must be walking in circles."

"I love you with all my belly. I would say my heart, but my belly is bigger."

"I like long romantic walks down every aisle at Target."

"I love you more than coffee but not always before coffee."

"I love you more than coffee but not always before coffee."
"I love you more than coffee but not always before coffee."

"Sometimes I wonder how you put up with me, but then I remember I put up with you, so we're even."

We hope these funny quotes about love made you laugh (or gave you a great Instagram caption for Valentine's Day). Happy Valentine's Day!