Former Daltonian reunites with children: 'Nothing is more important than your kids'

Jun. 30—When Deleina Stines was reunited with her children after having to be temporarily separated from them, it was "the best day of my life."

"I can't even explain the emotions and the happiness," said Stines. "There are no words for it. Nothing is more important than your kids."

"Your kids are everything, so you do what you have to for them," she said. "Our kids have nothing but us, so we have to be that rock for them."

Stines was in "kind of a crazy relationship — with drug use involved" — and so her children, Jace, now 7, and Lola, now 2, were sent to live with a friend of the family in January 2021, she said.

"I had to accept that I was wrong. At the end of the day, what I was doing, I wasn't putting my kids first."

In hindsight, "I needed that to wake up," she said.

Stines threw herself into sobriety, parenting classes and doing everything necessary to regain custody of her children.

From the moment Kelli Punchard met Stines, she was "impressed," said the CASA (Court-Appointed Special Advocate) assigned her family's case.

"She thought that would be the worst thing — to lose them permanently — she took every parenting class," and she called her case manager almost daily because "she didn't want to miss anything."

"I stood my ground, and I was determined," Stines said. "I did all the work, because, had I not gotten them back, I would've had nothing."

"You could tell immediately she was well-spoken and very determined," said Punchard. "Bottom line, she was very motivated to get her children back."

When children are removed from parents, the parents receive plans from a judge for how they can reunite with the children, according to Chelsea DeWaters, program manager for the Family Support Council's CASA program, which trains volunteers who then become advocates for children who are "in care," rather than with their biological parent/parents. That can involve everything from completing parenting classes to kicking substance abuse habits to establishing a residence to landing gainful employment, and they're usually given about a year to comply.

Stines and her children were reunited last June.

"The goal is reuniting families, (because) the best thing for children is to be with their families whenever possible," according to DeWaters. "We can't always (reunite families), but great effort is expended to bring them back together."

There is "no greater joy than knowing children get to go back with their families, their people," said Sophia Golliher, CASA volunteer supervisor. "Kids are not going to forget their parents. That's not the way we're built."

Celebrated each June, National Reunification Month recognizes the efforts of people nationwide who help families stay together. In Northwest Georgia, the Family Support Council is one organization dedicated to providing resources that help families remain strong and together, as well as offering avenues and guidance for reunification for parents who have been separated from their children.

Stines and her children have since relocated to Florida, after her son's grandfather offered an opportunity to escape "bad influences" in Dalton that could threaten to "pull (Stines) back" into a world of drugs, Punchard said. "It's phenomenal for her, and she's doing so well, now."

Stines had spent her life in Dalton, and much of her family remains here, so leaving for Florida last year was "hard in some senses, but I look at it like 'Look what I've accomplished in a year here compared to my life in Dalton,'" she said. "I needed to remove (myself) from that situation, I have a good job, now, phlebotomy, and I'm going for medical assistant."

This was Punchard's first case as a CASA, and "what a gift," she said. "I actually have another family, now, near reunification, so I've had two success stories, which is a blessing."

Stines is committed to doing everything she can to make sure her children avoid the mistakes she made.

"I've been through that, and it doesn't lead you anywhere but to the gutter you have to pull yourself out of and start all over," she said. "Life can be hard, and we turn to things we think will make us feel better, but that's only temporary."

"Your family, that's where true happiness comes from," she concluded. "Some of us don't realize that until they're gone, but you can get them back."