DIY rage brought interpersonal rage

Jun. 20—We all know about the avalanche of home projects last year as the pandemic forced us to take a new look at our homes and yards.

The rush to build decks, paint, upgrade basements, landscape and get new appliances caused a big shortage of everything from lumber to refrigerators.

It also created a shortage of patience in relationships.

A survey commissioned by Window World found that nearly half of respondents said their do-it-yourself home improvement projects caused disagreements with their spouse or significant other.

A slight majority said they worked out their disagreements pretty easily, but nearly one-third said they didn't speak to each other for hours, a quarter screamed at each other, and 2 in 10 simply walked out leaving the other person standing amid their DIY mess.

And 10% said their disputes over issues such as whether egg shell or gloss paint was superior led them to talk about moving out or separating.

It wasn't only relationships that took a beating. More than 10% said they got hurt on their DIY job, mostly scrapes and bruises but nearly a quarter who fractured a bone.

I suspect most every project, DIY or through a contractor, raises the stress between couples.

I love DIY projects, always have. But that doesn't mean I don't drag my feet when my wife — the Queen of Project Ideas — suggests her latest proposed task for me. They're often ideas of substantial effort — a white picket fence garden, dragging many Kasota stone slabs home for a backyard pathway, an addition to the cabin, laminate flooring throughout the house, walls to be removed, walls to be put up, making an herb garden, and the list goes on and on.

We have a well-rehearsed strategy for DIY projects. She casually mentions an idea in passing — "Wouldn't an arbor out back be nice" — and I pretend I hear nothing. Then little hand-drawn sketches of arbor designs are strategically placed on the counter or my side table. Then she asks, "So what do you think about an arbor?"

I list the many obstacles: digging down to put in a base, hauling in sand, the high cost of building materials, the many daunting design challenges, the time it would take.

"But I know you can do it, honey," she says. "Won't it look great?"

Game, set, match — and I'm on my way to Menards.

As for DIY injuries over the years, there's been a few, but too few serious ones to mention. Cuts, scrapes, bruises and muscle pulls but no trips to the ER.

But one near-serious injury is burned in my mind. I was building our cabin years ago, working inside putting a 10-foot tongue-and-groove board high up on the vaulted ceiling, standing several steps up the ladder. The tongue wasn't going into the groove easily, I reach over, too far, to pound it down. The side brace on the aluminum step ladder collapsed, my arms flailing but nothing to grab onto as I fell to the plywood floor.

I laid on the floor dazed, slowly focusing on body parts to see if they were just going to be bruised and sore or if there might be a fracture.

I sat up, hurting but happy it wasn't any worse. Nothing broken, I decided.

Then the tongue on the 10-foot plank let loose from the groove and fell on top of my head.

I crumpled back to the floor. Lying there, my cheek on the plywood floor, I thought, "You have to be kidding me." Too bad I didn't have a video camera mounted to capture it all. I could have made serious money on YouTube. At least the humiliation of the whole thing would have been profitable.

This spring we were at the cabin, sitting on the front deck. I was content, knowing the cabin was finally just like we'd hoped it'd be.

"Wouldn't a little guest cabin over there be nice?" my wife asked innocently. "I always loved those little A-frames."

I rolled my eyes. "Great, a nice tall A-frame, farther for me to fall. Lumber prices are sky high now. You know how much roofing those things need?"

She looked over sweetly. "Oh, I know you can do it, honey."

Tim Krohn can be contacted at tkrohn@mankatofreepress.com or 507-344-6383.