Bunker of denial: Browns QB Deshaun Watson should use suspension to accept culpability

BEREA — On Thursday, Browns quarterback Deshaun Watson succumbed to the wrath. But he didn't accept the truth.

The wrath came from NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell and from 31 owners angered over his $230 million guaranteed contract, resulting in the league's appeal of Watson's six-game suspension levied by former U.S. District judge Sue L. Robinson.

Rather than leave himself open to the minimum of a year the league wanted for his multiple violations of its personal conduct policy, Watson accepted a settlement of 11 games in 2022 and a $5 million fine, negotiated by the NFL and NFL Players Association. In addition, he must undergo a personal evaluation by behavioral experts and follow their treatment program.

In the ultimate irony, he will return for a Dec. 4 road game against his former team, the Houston Texans. The suspension will cost Watson $632,500 in game checks.

But will being forced to sit out that long change Watson?

A wakeup call for Deshaun Watson?

Something needs to wake up Watson, to teach him accountability, to ignite in him some semblance of empathy. Someone needs to make him realize that using his star status, he exhibited predatory behavior during massage appointments with 24 women who filed civil suits accusing him of sexual assault and sexual misconduct. Someone needs to help him come to grips with why he hired at least 66 massage therapists over a 17-month span, as Jenny Vrentas of the New York Times reported.

What will drag him from his bunker of denial that he has been hiding in for so long?

The mandated evaluation and resulting treatment? Being away from his new team for weeks? The $10 million Mike Florio of NBC Sports estimated he’s already spent in legal fees and to settle 23 of the suits? The $5 million fine? The boos and unprintable chants that began during his Browns preseason debut in Jacksonville and could be even more vicious in Houston and Pittsburgh?

Years of shame, including sitting out the 2021 season with the Texans as he sought a trade after the first of the civil suits were filed that March?

Why Deshaun Watson still appears embedded in his bunker

He's still embedded in that bunker, as evidenced by his comments Thursday.

"I’ve always stood on my innocence and always said that I’ve never assaulted anyone or disrespected anyone and I will continue to stand on that," Watson said. "But at the same time I have to continue to push forward with my life and my career. For us to be able to move forward, I have to be able to take steps and put pride to the side. I’m going to continue to stand on my innocence and keep pushing forward."

Settling all but one of the civil suits and accepting the negotiated settlement handled by his legal team did not cause him to acknowledge that he did anything wrong during those 24 massage appointments.

"I have to do what’s best for Deshaun Watson at the end of the day. I know what happened, I was in those situations," he said.

Even referring to himself in the third person was a turn-off.

Deshaun Watson:Deshaun Watson, NFL reach settlement to extend suspension to 11 games

In her 16-page ruling that gave Watson a six-game suspension on Aug. 1, Robinson cited Watson’s “lack of expressed remorse."

Deshaun Watson made his first public apology on Friday

Asked specifically about those words from Robinson, Watson made his first public apology Friday when he spoke to Aditi Kinkhabwala for a segment on the Browns' pregame show ahead of their 24-13 victory over the Jacksonville Jaguars at TIAA Bank Field.

“Look, I want to say that I’m truly sorry to all of the women that I have impacted in this situation," Watson said in the interview, conducted at the team's hotel before he left for the game. "The decisions that I made in my life that put me in this position I would definitely like to have back, but I want to continue to move forward and grow and learn and show that I am a true person of character and I am going to keep pushing forward.”

He did not tell his 24 accusers he was sorry. He was not facing the camera and there was no visible emotion as he spoke. He had ample time to prepare. He was not available to the media after the game in Jacksonville.

Proving he's a true person of character is a laudable goal. But at that point, there was no ruling by Peter C. Harvey, appointed by Goodell to handle the league's appeal, or a settlement. Watson's comments could have been perceived as a last-gasp plea for lenience.

Deshaun Watson's first public apology:'I want to say I'm truly sorry': Deshaun Watson speaks before first Browns preseason game

Most encouraging was that Watson said he was continuing counseling, which he said he didn't need in March but mentioned in June.

“I know I have a lot of work to put in, especially on the field to be able to make sure I’m ready to play whenever that time comes whenever I can step back on the field," Watson told Kinkhabwala. "But also, the biggest thing is I want to continue counseling and I want to make sure that I’m growing as a person, as an individual for my decision making on and off the field. I want to make sure that I’m just evolving in the community as much as possible, and that is for the Cleveland community, that is the NFL community and beyond."

Watson spoke Thursday for the first time since training camp began on July 27. During his two prior public appearances since he arrived in Cleveland in a March 18 trade from the Texans, Watson emphatically rebuffed every accusation.

Nothing has changed in that regard. He still doesn't understand what many are seeking — an apology that includes accountability and remorse.

Asked Thursday why he waited so long to apologize, Watson said, "Well, I apologized beforehand. I think the second time I spoke to you guys I actually apologized. But I think for some people it didn't maybe register as I was apologizing. I just wanted to clarify that I was apologizing to all women and people affected by the situation. Because it's definitely a tough situation."

Little has changed from his introductory news conference on March 25.

"I know these allegations are very, very serious," he said. "But I've never assaulted any woman. I've never disrespected any woman. I was raised by a single parent mom, who has two aunties, who's a sister, and that's who raised me.

"I was raised to be genuine and respect everyone and everything around me. So I've always defended that, and I will continue to stand on that.”

Chants, boos greet Watson:'Cleveland against the world'? Browns' Joel Bitonio downplays road reaction to Deshaun Watson

What did Deshaun Watson say on June 14?

On June 14, Watson stuck to his mantra, while trying to clarify the March 25 comment that he had “no regrets” about what had happened.

"I think that question kind of triggered a lot of people," Watson said in June. "Not just women in general but a lot of people in the league from women to males and things like that. What I was saying is, yes, I've never assaulted, disrespected or harassed anyone.

"But at the same time I understand and I do have regrets as far as the impact that it's had on the community and people outside of just myself. That includes my family, that includes this organization, that includes my teammates in this locker room that have to answer to these questions, that includes the fan base of the Cleveland Browns, that includes males, females, everyone across the world."

Violations of personal conduct policy: Read Sue L. Robinson's decision on Cleveland Browns QB Deshaun Watson in full

After Robinson’s ruling, co-owners Jimmy and Dee Haslam issued a statement saying, “We know Deshaun is remorseful that this situation has caused much heartache to many.”

Asked Thursday why he said Watson was remorseful, Jimmy Haslam said, "'Cause we're around him every day and he said he's remorseful.”

Browns fans have yet to see that remorse.

Robinson referred to Watson's conduct as “egregious” and wrote that he “used his status as an NFL player as a pretext to engage in a premeditated pattern of predatory behavior toward multiple women.” On that front, there is much for Watson to explore about himself in the months ahead.

Friday was a step, but perhaps a small, calculated one. The settlement was another. Any sort of progress cannot be minimized, but Watson has miles to go.

On Thursday, Dee Haslam summarized the Browns' stance on Watson continuing to maintain his innocence.

"Counseling takes time. You don’t just go to a counseling session and wake up and understand the impact it has," she said. "I think it’s a layering effect and it takes weeks, months, a long time to get to where you understand so much more about yourself. I think Deshaun has made progress since from the time he came here 'til now. ... But it’s not going to happen overnight. He’s 26 years old and he’s just getting into counseling. I think it’s going to take some time."

Asked specifically if she believes Watson is innocent, Dee Haslam said, "We respect his opinion. I think in counseling, Deshaun will grow to learn a lot more about himself.  … He’s doing the work; he’s committed to doing the hard work to make himself a better person."

Browns coach Kevin Stefanski said on Aug. 1 that Watson “is working to be the best version of himself," and Stefanski continues to reiterate that.

That doesn’t mean Watson is capable of drastic change. His character flaws could be too deeply entrenched, his sense of self too exaggerated for him to pull back. One mental health professional who emailed a Beacon Journal staffer after the Browns acquired Watson said they had given up treating those who commit sexual assault and switched to treating the victims because some aggressors were incapable of admitting the truth.

To get past the lawsuits that will forever stain his name, Watson needs to try to connect on a personal level with victims of sexual assault and those who decry his behavior. It will be a difficult journey that may not satisfy his accusers or his critics. But he can learn more about himself and grow. He can escape the bunker of denial.

Many remain hopeful that the “best version” of Watson that emerges from suspension is a man capable of culpability.

Marla Ridenour can be reached at mridenour@thebeaconjournal.com. Follow her on Twitter at www.twitter.com/MRidenourABJ.

This article originally appeared on Akron Beacon Journal: Cleveland Browns quarterback Deshaun Watson must face reality