The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (July 24-30)
The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious musings of 280 characters or fewer.
Scroll through this week’s great tweets from women below. Then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.
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woman: aw he’s so cute
me: thanks he’s a rescue
my boyfriend: stop telling people that— Sliz (@slizagna) July 24, 2021
Vegans be like I'm gonna buy some chîck'un, chēze, and mÿlk
— ምኞት (@blanketm9) July 25, 2021
The original air fryer. pic.twitter.com/iBwTtaAjWO
— Lo 💕 (@Lodizzle_V) July 26, 2021
You gotta experience serious heartbreak at 19 y/o so that you’re not on a reality TV show at 26 crying over a boy you’ve known for a week
— tweety. 🤎 (@MsOgechi) July 28, 2021
Stop making fun of women who can’t decide on a restaurant. The first woman who knew what she wanted for dinner was Eve and she paid dearly
— tabitha (@thetolerantweft) July 27, 2021
i hate when people say “we don’t deserve dogs.” i do deserve a dog
— helen (@helen) July 28, 2021
Got a CV today and the guy literally listed one of his skills as ‘googling’
We’re interviewing him— Cat McGee (@CatMcGeeCode) July 23, 2021
what did he do https://t.co/4saLLqm70Q
— nolan (@anxiousdeluxe) July 28, 2021
One of my employees said he doesn’t wanna get married to his long term girlfriend because he doesn’t want her to “take half” .... I asked him what he had and now we’re sitting in silence.
— Caresha Scott King (@_PoisonIveyy) July 26, 2021
my favorite thing about the olympics is how every four years I'm convinced I care deeply about water polo
— shauna (@goldengateblond) July 26, 2021
give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a woman to fish and men will ask her who holds the record for catching a 138lb 6oz bass in 1969 for a lifetime
— jo (@whatsJo) July 25, 2021
Logging on to Twitter each morning: pic.twitter.com/bySrJthXrL
— Ellie Hall (@ellievhall) July 28, 2021
does gen z know that in order to go to the movies we used to have to call a hotline and wait for a disembodied voice to tell us our options
— Jill Gutowitz (@jillboard) July 28, 2021
Hey nice attachment style, did your mom pick it out for you?
— mary (@sheila__larson) July 26, 2021
i do think a lot of internet teens are famous just bc they have good lighting in their bedroom
— Dana Donnelly (@danadonly) July 24, 2021
Okay so we’re doing plague, locusts and now floods. As a first born, I’m…concerned. https://t.co/ot9WtTMBSm
— Camilla Blackett (@camillard) July 25, 2021
I wish I could just drop my body off at the gym and go pick it up after the workout 😭
— Andrea (@DreaNicole_) July 27, 2021
didn't make much progress on figuring out how to watch the olympics but, thanks to olympics dot com, I won't be walking away totally emptyhanded pic.twitter.com/bIQqDz5CuT
— Ashley Feinberg (@ashleyfeinberg) July 27, 2021
If you’re trying to lose weight, a handful of almonds is a great thing to angrily throw at your reflection in the mirror.
— Grey DeLisle-Griffin (@GreyDeLisle) July 27, 2021
I do not want to hold your baby. do not give me your baby to hold…I will drop it.
— queen quen (@quenblackwell) July 27, 2021
This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.