Winnie the Pooh Banned for Having No Pants, 'Problem With His Identity'


Photo by Disney

Winnie-the-Pooh, that willy nilly silly old bear, has found himself at the center of controversy in the small town of Tuszyn, Poland, according to the Croatian TimesIt seems local councilors were meeting to decide on the mascot of a town playground, when one official suggested they use the lovable star resident of the Hundred Acre Wood.

That’s when the bear, beloved around the world for his unwavering devotion to both honey and friendship, was deemed “wholly inappropriate for children” by more-conservative members of the local council. “The problem with that bear is it doesn’t have a complete wardrobe,” Councillor Ryszard Cichy, 46, reportedly said regarding Pooh’s famous red crop top. 

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“It doesn’t wear underpants because it doesn’t have a sex. It’s a hermaphrodite,” said one official, according to a recording of the meeting that was apparently leaked to local press.

It was Pooh’s lack of genitals that ultimately proved to be too much for the officials. “This is very disturbing as you can imagine!” councillor Hanna Jachimska said, criticizing legendary “Winnie-the-Pooh” creator A. A. Milne. “The author was over 60 and cut [Pooh’s] testicles off with a razor blade because he had a problem with his identity.”

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The council has not yet decided on the face of the playground, according to the story. But the “half-naked” bear, unsurprisingly, is out.

Good thing no one suggested Donald Duck. 

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