A week after vacation, she’s still recovering. That means the trip was a huge success
Alas, I’m still blabbing about my vacation. It’s not that I even want to be talking about it. But people have asked me questions and I feel like it would be ungracious of me not to respond to at least two of the most probing queries.
The question I received in abundance is why my husband and I didn’t just go with a tour group on our trip to Europe, instead of “winging it,” especially since “we’re old.” Well, here’s the unflattering truth. It’s me. I’m the problem.
Why? Because I hate people. OK, not really, but kind of really, because in any group setting I’m trapped in, at least one person is destined to drive me insane.
It doesn’t matter if I’m in a jam-packed line for a ride at Disneyland or stuck with a flock of parents during a college tour, I’ll soon be silently seething over the actions of one annoying person.
This means the thought of floating down the Rhine on a 12-day river cruise while locked in with a static set of human beings has all the makings of me losing my mind. Before you could say “bon voyage” there would be at least one individual that I was already starting to form an intense and immediate dislike of.
Most likely it would be the person that had already designated themselves either “the fun guy” on the trip or the “know it all.” And Lord have mercy on my soul if one person is both of these things. I couldn’t exit the boat, group tour or excursion — you name it –fast enough.
One would think this, let’s call it a personality issue, would annoy my husband. But no, I secretly think he’s fine with it, based solely on all the money it’s saving. Those tours are expensive. It’s much cheaper to use all the hotel points and airline miles you’ve hoarded and go it alone.
And what’s not to like about going it alone? There’s freedom because since it’s just me and my husband, we can change our plans. Don’t like this city? Let’s move on. There’s also all that delightful and robust interaction, and by that I mean arguing, about what train to get on, that no couple would want to miss. Ahh, the memories.
I’ve also had people, ever so politely, ask me why our vacation resembled a “death march.” Certainly, having activities planned from 8 a.m. to 11 p.m. might not be everyone’s cup of tea. But I was born into a family where the most oft used vacation quote was, “We didn’t come all this way for you to sleep.” Fortunately, my husband was raised the exact same way.
In fact, a beach vacation makes both of us nervous. We can do two days, and that’s pushing it, of lounging by the pool or frolicking in the ocean. When you were raised on a “go, go, go” vaca mentality, it’s hard to embrace a kick back and chill vibe.
Our family’s sign of a great vacation is if you’re thoroughly exhausted once you arrive home. I’m not saying this is right and I acknowledge that it could be a sign of a couple in need of a mental health intervention, but it’s just the way it is. If I came home rested from a vacation, I’d feel like I hadn’t really used my days off to their fullest.
For me the fact that I’m still tired and we’ve been home for a week and half is the sign of a most excellent vacation. And bonus, I was never in a forced group setting. This meant my husband was the only person who annoyed me and that’s what I call a trip to paradise.
Reach Sherry Kuehl at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com, on Facebook at Snarky in the Suburbs, on Twitter at @snarkynsuburbs on Instagram @snarky.in.the.suburbs, and snarkyinthesuburbs.com.
