A 74-year-old retired judge was killed in a crash in Durham over the weekend.
maurice: Given the broad interest in polls, The R.U. Kidding Foundation is launching a contest, where the objective is to guess the percentage of the popular vote Clinton and Trump will receive. The names of all participants with the exact or the closest percentage will be entered in a draw for their choice of the following ten (10)“once in a lifetime experiences” A weekend at a 3K Training Camp, offering a chance to rub shoulders (and possibly other body parts) with Duke and Imperial Grand Wizard wannabes. Ten hours of counselling by Gay America’s new Queen, Caitlyn J., on makeup, wardrobe and TG bathroom etiquette; providing you with the confidence to finally explore your feminine side. One night in New Orleans with the winner of a Louisiana wide Sarah Palin Look Alike contest. Even better than the real thing apparently, given the absence of a gag reflex. Two hours in Trump’s secret underground vault with unlimited access to “never before seen” documents, including Obama’s ”Out of Africa” birth certificate, the NFL letter regarding the presidential debates and the “uncensored” Scalia post-mortem police report. One Blue Bayou night in a pup tent with one of Rush Limbaugh’s morbidly obese cousins, after consumption by both parties of two huge cans of Bush’s baked beans. A unique opportunity to become a smart feller or a fart smeller (and possibly both). A weekend safari with Walter Palmer and Ted Nugent, affording you the possibility of killing your own Cecil or some other creature to decorate your man cave. A Saturday afternoon using a vintage Etch-Sketch device with Jeb Bush to complete the plans for his future Presidential Library; allowing you a unique vantage point to observe his low level flights into Megalomania A Sunday afternoon of playing croquet and lawn bowling with Ted Cruz and his less sexy than Melania wife; allowing you to also roll on the grass upon hearing one after another of his rib splitting jokes; many of them involving his Dad's role in the JFK "extermination" and more than a little naughty. In case of rain, the fun will move inside and the games will be your choice of Twister, Tiddly Winks, Trivial Pursuit and yes, “just wait until we get your Hanes off you” Strip Poker. A romantic afternoon encounter with one of Liberace’s former boy toys. An incredible opportunity to personally discover why he preferred tulips on his small organ to roses on his grand piano. A trip to North Korea with Dennis Rodman as your guide; offering you a chance to shoot some hoops with Kim Junk No Fun and unless you want to piss him off, to get a haircut from his personal barber.