Possum Gazes Longingly At Family Walking Dog

The OnionMay 12, 2013

A heartbroken Chris Brown always thought Rihanna was the woman he'd beat to death, a mentally unstable man is planning on exhibiting one or two more warning signs before finally doing this, and a snooze button time travler sets his coordinates for 5-minutes into the future. It's the week of May 10, 2013.