Man Buys Stolen Python & Immediately Regrets It

Broken News Daily

Dwayne Matthews, a 29-year-old man in Coventry, England, was at a house party when a van pulled up selling snakes. Dwayne bought Bruce, a 10 ft long Python, with the intent to sell him later. Unfortunately for Dwayne, Bruce was stolen property, and pretty mad about it. Dwayne awoke the next morning to see Bruce the Snake trying to eat his sleeping friend. After saving his friend, Dwayne tried to sell Bruce to a local pet shop and was arrested for possession of stolen goods. This sort of thing is exactly why I never go to parties.