Avoid Baggage Fees With This Jacket?

Broken News Daily

Engineer John Power was so fed up with paying bag fees on airlines he decided to do something about it. His invention is called the JAKTOGO. The ingenious wearable luggage carries up to twenty-two pounds of your belongings and can fold into a bag. Sounds great, but too bad it makes the wearer look like a lumpy, grey Kool-Aid man. OOOOH NOOOO! In our spooky second story, which horror movies burn the most calories? Stop eating The Amityville Horror on Laserdisc!