DEAR ABBY: Veterans Day is next week, and I hope you'll address something I have encountered over the years. I am a Navy veteran who served four years as a Seabee. I was one of the first women to be assigned to a combat unit, and I am proud of my service. However, I dread it when Veterans Day rolls around. Why do people assume that because I'm a woman I am not a veteran?
Two years ago, when I went into a restaurant that serves veterans a free meal, the man in front of me was asked if he wanted a veterans' menu. He declined. The hostess did not ask me if I needed one; I had to request it. Later in the meal, the manager went to each of the tables speaking to the veterans, but skipped mine.
Today, many women serve, and it should not be a stretch that some veterans are female. Would you comment, Abby? -- OVERLOOKED IN LEXINGTON, KY.
DEAR OVERLOOKED: Gladly. I can understand why you were offended. However, I hope you realize that what happened occurred because of these people's ignorance, and it wasn't personal. While our armed forces have always been predominantly male, women have officially been part of our military only since World War II.
Many veterans wear hats or other items that identify what branch of the service they were in. To prevent this oversight from happening to you again, wear an insignia next Monday, which is Veterans Day. If you do, it will draw attention to the fact that many women serve in the military, which might be helpful to other female veterans. Thank you for your service to our country.
DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are having a disagreement about texting. She insisted that you can text anyone anytime -- day or night. I feel you shouldn't text after a time when you wouldn't call someone.
Cellphones are set to ring when texts come in just as landlines do. I say if you don't need an immediate response, send an email. What is proper etiquette regarding when people should send texts? -- POLITE IN KATY, TEXAS
DEAR POLITE: I don't think there are hard-and-fast rules of etiquette regarding texting -- yet. But common sense would suggest that if people suspect they "might" disturb someone by texting, then they should refrain. Of course, recipients who don't wish to be interrupted can put their cellphones on silent or turn them off.
If the texts you're arguing about are intruding on time the two of you should be concentrating on each other, I see no reason why they shouldn't be responded to the next day.
DEAR ABBY: Our family is moving into a new house soon. When we were looking at the house, our 10-year-old daughter asked if she could have the bigger bedroom. We said yes, and our 12-year-old son said he "didn't care."
We have been in contract for two months and have gone to see the house several times. When we did our final walk-through, our son pulled my husband aside and said because he is older, he should get the bigger bedroom.
Of course, our daughter is upset. My husband seems to think the older kid should get his way. My thought is that our son had more than two months to speak up, but at the 11th hour the green-eyed monster is emerging. What do you think? -- STARTING ANEW IN OHIO
DEAR STARTING ANEW: I think that at this point, to keep peace in your new home, it would be advisable for your children to draw straws to decide who gets the larger bedroom.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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