This Is Us Star Chrissy Metz on Kate's Miscarriage: It's Not Something People Talk About

Kevin (Justin Hartley) was in deep pain last week on This Is Us, but his twin sister Kate (Chrissy Metz) experienced an even greater tragedy in the broadcast’s final minutes: She and fiancé Toby (Chris Sullivan) lost their baby.

Tuesday’s episode, “Number Two,” returned to the same 24-hour period that we first saw during the Kevin-centric installment, but this time, we followed the aftermath of Kate and Toby’s devastating loss. The couple was undoubtedly excited for their baby on the way, with Kate diligently making a list of pregnancy questions for her doctor and Toby ensuring his fiancée got all her prenatal nutrients. All the while, viewers saw teenage Kate (Hannah Zeile) show her maternal side through the caring of family dog Louie.

However, something went desperately wrong, with no explanation for Kate’s miscarriage. She turned the huge question mark into an assumption that was her fault, perhaps for being overweight or an older expectant mother. The miscarriage tested Kate and Toby’s relationship like never before, all while strengthening Kate’s mother-daughter dynamic with Rebecca (Mandy Moore), who delivered stillborn triplet son Kyle.

So many questions. Thankfully, Metz unpacked the episode with PEOPLE and talked all about breaking the silence of miscarriage on network television, in addition to what to expect from the Big 3 in forthcoming episodes.

How did you get into character for this episode, specifically for the miscarriage scenes? What resonated with you while shooting that sequence?

As a woman, I’ve never been in that situation, so it was difficult for me to be in that space, but because there’s so much empathy, I tried to incorporate so much understanding of when you want something so desperately and you finally conceive a life. You don’t know when to bring it up or how to bring it up. You feel like there was something to be done or that you weren’t good enough to have a child. You lost the baby. It’s not just about conceiving but bringing the baby to term and getting ready, there are so many layers to a pregnancy that just aren’t discussed because people are really afraid to talk about it, and it’s not glamorous and it’s not fun. It’s not something people are ecstatic to talk about.

Many viewers either have experienced a miscarriage or know someone who has. Yet it’s something that is rarely shown on network television.

Kate’s miscarriage brought her closer to Rebecca physically and emotionally, finally reaching a breakthrough bonding moment. What will this new direction bring them?

That hug between Kate and Rebecca was much more expressive than any pages of dialogue. The simplest act meant so much to both of them.

Mandy is an actress and a human being, and a gift to work with. Opening that door and the look that she gave me, it was so heartfelt. And of course, I saw my mom in her, and I felt like the little kid. There are so many complex layers to that hug. That acknowledgment that she showed up. It’s a quick little scene, there was so much to be said without any words. That’s such a testament to the trust that the writers have in the actors and for the characters, but also that sometimes things don’t even need to be said, you just know exactly what someone is feeling and what they need. She finally let herself fall into her mother’s arms for the first time.

Another important person in the episode is Toby. This really, really difficult time challenges their relationship and tests if it can survive.

Kate and Toby are constantly tested. And constantly proving that they really do love each other. They love each other through the ups and the downs, just being very exposed. You’re getting to see the raw versions of each of these characters. You still love the person through all of it, that’s true love. That’s the love for someone you want to be with, who is going to show up for you. In turn, you’re gonna show up for them. It’s not just romantic or fun but difficult, really, really difficult. Their love for each other is real.

Will Kate and Toby want to try for another baby?

It’s hopeful in that they are going to want to try again and conceive again. Just like many couples. I’m sure we’ll talk to a lot of them after this episode airs. It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it. You can’t let it break you but hopefully, make you stronger. That’s exactly what this did for Kate and Toby. When the time is right, they’re gonna try again. They do want a family because they want to be together. You just see how committed Toby is to Kate and her happiness. He doesn’t know how to control anything in this situation but the only thing he can preempt is not getting that baby bath delivered to the house. That in turn, he gives away and that helps another family and it’s beautiful on another level.

We saw Kevin ignore the calls from Kate and Toby that day. She really leaned on Toby while her twin brother spiraled. How much guilt is Kevin going to feel?

I think there will be a lot of guilt. But as I prepared and processed the next couple episodes we shot after this one, you have to realize that yes, it’s a huge, huge hurdle in Kate’s life, but Kevin has so many things he’s dealing with. When you have a bond with a sibling or a significant other, you have to have compassion and empathy for what they’re going through, and if he could be there mentally and emotionally, he would, but he was so just entrenched in his pain. Hopefully, he doesn’t take that on and feel worse for it, because that’s not what Kate would want for him.

That’s a really good perspective. We have blinders on in our own lives. Sometimes it’s to our advantage, and sometimes getting out of our own heads and being of service by showing up for other people ultimately ends up helping us in a much bigger way. I think that’s really cool of them showing not only the dynamic between the Big 3 but how the parents reacted to each of them. Kevin walked first, we see that Kate hasn’t quite got it, she’s sort of in the shadows, always trying to catch up to her brothers. That plays so much in her adulthood with Randall. It’s such an interesting way of quickly telling so much of a backstory. We can get so bogged down in our lives that we miss what’s really missing. But at the same time, it’s so important to figure out what’s going on before you can even show up for someone else. You have to, like they say, put the oxygen mask on yourself first. You just do. You got to love yourself before you love anyone else. And that continues to show up because we see Kate hasn’t had a great relationship with a man until Toby. Kevin can’t seem to keep Sophie even though he wants to, he doesn’t feel like he’s worthy. So all of those themes continue to play through, just diving deeper into the pain of all of that and how do you get through it. It’s very layered.

What can you tease for “Number Three,” the final episode of the trilogy that will focus on Randall?

This Is Us airs Tuesdays at 9 p.m. ET on NBC.