Jealous Puppies are Destroying Smartphones at an Alarming Rate

Turns out toddlers, teens, and oafish adults aren’t the only ones who destroy their smartphones. Man’s best friend and his furry allies may have a hand — or, rather, a paw — in it.

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Some 28 million Americans report having had at least one digital device damaged by a pet, according to a new survey from SquareTrade, the aftermarket warranty vendor. Four out of 10 say their pets gnawed through a power cord; one in three say their beloved companions mistook a phone for a bone — or worse. (Let’s just say fluids were involved and leave it at that.)

Canines were the leading culprits, with puppies three times more likely to do the deed. And then feel really awful afterward, we’re sure.

The leading motivations, according the owners: jealousy and anger at being ignored. In one out of four cases, the pets damaged a device while their human was still using it. Let’s hope fluids were not involved in those cases.

The survey also reveals that a sixth of all pet owners have created social media accounts for their four-legged friends, and nearly 20 percent have held video chats with them using Skype or FaceTime.

Morals of this story:

1. Get a protective cover for your phone.

2. Don’t piss off the pooch — she might turn your iPhone into a chew toy. Or unfriend you on Facebook.

Questions, complaints, kudos? Email Dan Tynan at ModFamily1@yahoo.com.