Someone at the Vatican Is Downloading Really Dirty Porn

That whole secret report on gay sex and bribery and the Pope aside, the Catholic Church is known for being fairly uptight when it comes to doing the deed. So you might be surprised to learn that someone in the Vatican has a taste for leather. Sexy leather.

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The file-sharing folks at TorrentFreak discovered that some Vatican City IP addresses were fairly frequent torrent users, downloading episodes of Chicago Fire, Touch, and The Americans. Someone in the Vatican also downloaded Love Actually, which isn't that surprising because it's a great movie, obviously, though we suspect they probably don't agree with some of the humor. But Bill Nighy's potty mouth is hardly the worst thing TorrentFreak has discovered in the download caches within the confines ofthe Catholic Church headquarters. There was porn, too. And lots of it. 

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While TorrentFreak declined to say what kind of porn some poor Vatican citizen was interested in, Fleshbot had no problem busting the Church's hidden freaks. [LINK IS VERY NSFW] "This Is The BDSM Porn They Watch In The Vatican," their headline reads. And, yeah, it's that simple. The files are for movies like TS Pussy Hunters, and Whipped Ass, and something called Russian Slaves. They sound... interesting. (As TorrentFreak suggests, "feel free to do your own 'research' using the titles shown above.")

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Now, we can't say for certain if it's a cardinal or a priest or the Pope downloading these smutty things. Can you imagine the Pope — even the last one, though most of the IP addressed point to recent downloads — watching something called Whipped Ass? Well, no, don't answer that. Anyway, it could be one of the servants or a member of the Swiss Guard. We'll never know who it is, really. But someone in that small little town has some interesting taste. Kind of like that Velvet Mafia dossier that uncovered this: "the cardinals were said to have uncovered an underground gay network, whose members organise sexual meetings in several venues in Rome and Vatican City, leaving them prone to blackmail." 

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Well, this isn't blackmail, but speculate away!