Royal Weddings Need David Beckham's Neck Tattoos
There are some things in life you can only get away with doing if you're really, really good at something. Having neck tattoos at a royal wedding, for example. David Beckham, a man of palpable beauty, did just that for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding today. It's unclear whether his superb soccer skills or his penchant for being a beautiful piece of man are what brought him to this level. One can only speculate.
Here's the deal: David and Victoria Beckham, the two most attractive people on the planet, rolled up to St. George's Chapel for the wedding. You know, as you do when you're a Beckham. And while Dave has long served as King of Dirty Hot, seeing him be this way in a formal, traditionally British place of worship does something to a person. Dirty hot, if you're unfamiliar, is a person who is disturbingly attractive but also looks like they need a shower-or, that you might need a shower after having been disturbed by their beauty. I hate to objectify, but in morning dress with a face like that and tattoos like those, Beckham is an actual slab of porterhouse. Observe:
Anyway, Beckham's excessive amounts of tattoos have allowed him to lean into this aesthetic. And you know what? He deserves it. Most neck tattoos are regrettable (fact, not opinion), but not for Beckham. He's a family man who wears the hell out of a suit, but he is not boring. He is not one dimensional. He will not be put into your box of preconceived notions of neck tattoos. Throughout his time in the public eye, he has maintained his own air of rebellion, which, albeit different than Prince Harry's, is the name of the game at this edition of the royal wedding. Hands are held! Traditions are broken! David Beckham leaves neck tattoos on full display! Welcome to the modern Royal Wedding you didn't know you needed.
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