Poor Newt Gingrich May Never Have Power
How did we not know this sooner? In a Washington Post op-ed today, Newt Gingrich reveals that he was a victim of Derecho, the freak occurrence of thunderstorms that ripped and ruined power grids in the Washington, D.C. area two weeks ago, and found out living without power was absolutely terrible. No, the joke and symbolism of Newt Gingrich lamenting a life without "power" isn't lost on us, but guys, he was really suffering! "Callista and I live in the Virginia suburbs of Washington, and, like many in the region, we lost power in the recent storms," Gingrich writes, presuming universal familiarity with his wife, Callista. "The blackout, combined with a record heat wave, made homes nearly uninhabitable... Without power, the comforts of home become worthless. You sit in the sweltering heat, realizing you are living in a box that, without electricity, is a trap. You pray for the 'juice' to return before your groceries go bad. You either make do in the heat or find refuge with friends who have electricity."
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The thought of a sweaty Gingrich sitting in the dark in his acrid mansion (well, we imagine it as acrid anyway) is totally sad, but even sadder is when you realize that the former candidate may not only be talking about "electricity" and is actually crying out for our attention.
