A Plymouth Prowler Trailer Bra Will Solve All Of Your Problems, Except One
The Plymouth Prowler, that rolling vehicular equivalent equivalent of shouting "The Good Ol' Days!" after an Eagles song plays at the weekly Cruzzin' Dreams Car Show at Hebert's Candy Mansion, may be the only production car that could have been be ordered with a $5000 accessory trailer, right from the dealer, wbichs resembles the rear half of its parent car. How cool was that? Complete with inevitable chrome wheels! Finally, Prowler owners had room their Callaway Big Bertha Alpha 816 Double Black Diamond Drivers! Or their BC Rich custom axe and speaker enclosures, cranking KISS from across the Hy-Vee parking lot.
Hell yeah. That Prowler trailer matches its retro-styled Autosticked dreamboat flawlessly, even if Chrysler once had a different idea about trunk space. But once said trailer is distended from its mother ship, it is a curious-looking thing, resembling the unholy union between a squashed grapefruit and a bass boat's cooler filled with Zimas. Hey, that paint is only original once, right? Better stick a Car Bra on it.
That's right: that pantheon of practicality, that apex of driving tastefully, the automotive version of wearing a retainer to gym class: you know it's there for a good reason, but it does no favors in the image department. (It's not even that good a reason, sometimes.) You can get a Car Bra for your Plymouth Prowler-you can get many car bras for your Plymouth Prowler-and you can get a Car Bra for your Plymouth Prowler trailer, in faux leather grain and embroidered with the now-legendary Prowler logo, in order to protect that exclusive Prowler Metallic Purple paint from the rocks and gravel your meaty rear 295-width tires will throw up from all the burnouts you're inevitably doing. Practical? Sure, we'll begrudgingly admit. Stylish? There is little room here to debate the stylistic merits of the Car Bra, aside from the fact that the Car Bra is deeply, extraordinarily, painfully uncool-the equivalent of black Dockers Cushion Comfort Sport Crew socks socks with a pair of TEVA sandals.
Get yours here, rather conveniently on Amazon, for the low, low price of just $159.99 (Free shipping!) Here's what the only review, a two-star conclusion, says: "Its [sic] very hard to put on, and you have to use two sided tape around top edge of trailer, so that messes up your paint."
Great job! A product designed to protect your paint, which by the very dint of its installation messes up your paint.
Of course, if all this is too much for you, you can always spend a semester of your grandkids' college tuition on a one-off trailer that makes your Prowler look like it's pulling a tiny Ford Mustang. No bra required.
Images via Wheelsage
