How parents can recognize and prevent child abuse

GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. (WOOD) — A Forest Hills Public Schools cleaner remains on leave after he was arrested on federal child pornography charges.

The district confirmed in a letter to parents that 28-year-old Bradley Arkesteyn worked in several schools starting in February 2023, including Collins Elementary, Meadow Brook Elementary, Northern Trails, Northern Hills Middle School and Northern High School. The district said criminal background and unprofessional conduct checks didn’t raise any red flags.

No Forest Hills students are believed to be his victims, but some parents previously raised alarm bells over his behavior.

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A federal court document written by an FBI agent says Arkesteyn shared child pornography with an undercover agent on the messaging app Kik. Arkesteyn allegedly admitted to being attracted to children and receiving and sending child porn through Kik and Telegram.

The agency said Arkesteyn told the undercover investigator he worked at an elementary school and talked to children there, several of whom were friendly with him.

According to the document, Arkesteyn said he had been viewing child porn for about a decade, and he obtained nude photos of minors through the now-defunct chat site Omegle. The FBI later searched his Rockford-area home and found child porn links on his phone, according to court records.

When agents eventually interviewed Arkesteyn, he allegedly “admitted to smelling the shoes of 1st through 4th grade students.”

“He claimed this was an involuntary action that he could not control,” the document said.

Child porn suspect is Forest Hills worker

Before Arkesteyn was arrested, a Forest Hills parent told News 8 she had previously asked another parent who volunteers in the district to “keep an eye on him.”

“He has given me the ick at (Northern Trails),” she said in a text message, going on to say that her daughter “talks about him nonstop… He told her yesterday that she is the only student (whose) name he remembers and has described his girlfriend to her.”

Forest Hills Public Schools said that based on the FBI investigation, no children from the district were victimized. But that may not be enough to calm a parent’s fear, something that advocate Emily Kulhanek deals with everyday.

“Families are very overwhelmed when they come through the doors, it’s very overwhelming to navigate the system,” said Kulhanek, an advocate for the Children’s Advocacy Center of Kent County.

The Children’s Advocacy Center of Kent County brings children and families affected by abuse together with law enforcement, Children’s Protective Services, medical personnel, therapists and advocates. The group provides forensic interviews and therapy to survivors throughout Kent County.

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Kulhanek says grooming is more prevalent than people think.

“I think each person who commits abusive acts knows exactly the game they’re playing,” she said.

Kulhanek said the average age of disclosure of child sexual abuse is 52. She says survivors are less likely to come forward when the abuser is a trusted person in their life.

“Someone who’s committing those acts is going to try to get the biggest investment with the least amount of risk,” Kulhanek said.

She said parents should talk to their kids as early as possible about body safety and boundaries.

“We can’t expect kids to tell us if we’re just starting to talk about body safety way down the road,” Kulhanek said.

She recommended parents normalize those conversations and teach children to be open about what they’re experiencing. Kids should be aware of what’s not OK so they can recognize the signs when they are being targeted.

“Talk to them about who is allowed to do that: What are those feelings that come up?” Kulhanek said. “What does it mean to be safe?”

As kids get older, they may not recognize they are being abused if they don’t know the signs ahead of time, she said.

Kulhanek advised families to remember these red flags: an abuser having extended alone time with a child, providing an excessive amount of attention and showering them with gifts or praise.

“Just (be) aware of some of these possible motives of why they’re entering into (a child’s) life and wanting to step into those roles,” she said.

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If kids don’t share what’s going on, parents can watch out for changes in their child’s behavior.

“The biggest red flags are behavioral changes, whether it’s sleeping, isolating,” she said. “It can be mental health concerns, it can be again that overattachment or isolation.”

Kulhanek also advised parents to tell children what the age of consent is.

Most reports of childhood abuse that the children’s advocacy center deals with come through law enforcement. If families don’t want to come forward to police, Kulhanek said they can also talk to doctors, therapists and educators. Those professionals are mandatory reporters and legally bound to share what’s going on.

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