NYPD Launches Full-Scale Investigation Into Theft of Staten Island Mailbox

The NYPD is on the trail of a dastardly mailbox thief in Staten Island. In a "New York Post Exclusive," Jamie Schram writes of the apparently all-out police effort to track down the culprit in the brazen heist of the mailbox of Congressman Michael Grimm, aka, the former "Tea Party darling" of Staten Island. Earlier this week, some jerk removed the mailbox, which had a lovely engraved eagle on it but was believed to be empty at the time. The mailbox's stone base is "all that remains." 

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The Post sets the scene, which you're sure to see soon in a ripped-from-the-headlines police drama: 

In a scene that looked like an episode of “CSI: Staten Island,” cops launched a full-scale investigation at the home of Congressman Michael Grimm — after his mailbox was stolen, police sources said yesterday.

Investigators dusted for fingerprints and swabbed the purloined postbox’s stone base for skin cells that could provide DNA clues, police sources said.

Despite the impressive police effort, locals were nonplussed. "I can’t imagine why somebody would want a mailbox. It’s just stupid," said one. The mailman who's delivered the route for years suggested the culprit may be unruly kids. Because who else would want a mailbox?

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Who, indeed.

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Grimm, who, for the record, is not only a Republican congressman but also former FBI agent, had no comment about the mailbox, though he did deny allegations from the Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics yesterday that he'd been involved in illegal fund-raising. We await the resolution of these alleged crimes with baited breath.