No One Wants to Hear Mumford & Sons Rap

David Wagner
The Atlantic Wire

Mumford & Sons strummed and harmonized their way to a Grammy for Album of the Year, but now they're ready to ditch the folksy acoustics for rap. Everyone on the Internet is already stopping their ears. Rolling Stone's Patrick Doyle caught up with Marcus Mumford and those three other scruffy dudes as they start to rehearse material for their third album. Judging from their chat, the band's big win at this year's Grammys coupled with their five-week run at the top of the Billboard albums charts has emboldened them to get a bit experimental. When Doyle asks what direction they're moving in for the follow-up to 2012's runaway success Babel, Mumford says:

Like, hip-hop. We really want to rap. We've just got so much to say — saying it through a melody doesn't really work for me. We've been talking with Jay-Z about it, you know. It's gonna be a fresh experience for our band. 

They're currently hatching this new direction during downtime on their tour, and Mumford describes their backstage sessions as pretty edgy. "We're like, 'Motherfucker!'" he says. That's right. The Mumford men — they of the frantically plucked banjo, the elite London private school background, the artfully distressed chambray button-up — will try to curse like Jay-Z on their next album. You're not the only one who thinks that sounds like the worst music anyone could ever make:

:(((((( "Marcus Mumford told Rolling Stone of the band’s desire to rap, seeking out veteran rapper Jay-Z for input."…

— Cord Jefferson (@cordjefferson) February 25, 2013

This can't possibly be a real article. Marcus Mumford: 'We Really Want to Rap' via @rollingstone

— Kurt Trowbridge (@KurtTrowbridge) February 25, 2013

Just let this sink in. Absorb the hate and embarrassment.…

— hannah chipperfield (@hanchipperfield) February 25, 2013

Mumford and sons wanting to rap is why i hate thrift shop

— Ned (@beatsbyned) February 25, 2013

Just read interview w/Mumford & Sons saying they want to rap. I'm about ready for them to return to their homeland. For good.

— Brandi (@msraisingirl) February 25, 2013

We have napalm. RT @grahamdavida Marcus Mumford: "We really want to rap."…

— Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) February 25, 2013

This is basically the horsemeat-in-Ikea-meatballs of music. via @cordjefferson

— Philip Bump (@pbump) February 25, 2013

Oh good christ, apocalypse now. RT @pastemagazine: Mumford & Sons' Marcus Mumford says he wants to give hip-hop a try

— Ned Raggett (@NedRaggett) February 25, 2013

It's quite possible that Wiz Khalifa is the only person down with MC Marcus Mumford