No One Cares About Ryan Lochte
Today in show business news: Ryan Lochte's new show is not a hit, Game of Thrones definitely is, and Shia LaBeouf keeps getting work for some reason.
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Sunday night saw the premiere of Olympic swimbo Ryan Lochte's new E! reality show What Would Ryan Lochte Do? and it did not go well. I guess no one really cared what Ryan Lochte would do! Who Will Ryan Lochte Do? might have been better, some sort of game show with a sexy prize for one lucky winner. But as is? Disaster. Had this been a race he wouldn't even have been close to meddling. The show brought in only 807,000 viewers in its first airing, way down from its "Ryan Seacrest interviews the Kardashians" lead-in. So I guess the good-looking guys don't always win! Ryan Lochte is dead in the water and Don Draper is in free fall. Not good, guys. [The Hollywood Reporter]
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Everything's going great in Westeros, though. Sunday night's Game of Thrones episode broke yet another ratings record, reeling in 4.9 million people in its initial 9 p.m. broadcast. That's pretty darn good! We'll see how long the show can keep growing, as the plot ges ever more complicated and certain characters, er, cease to exist. But I don't really see the show peaking anytime soon. HBO shows can be a slow burn, and here, about halfway through its third season, Game of Thrones seems in prime position. But I don't know, maybe people are loyal enough fans of whosie and whatsie that once they're gone, along with some other folks, the audiences will disappear. Seems unlikely though. It's only going to get more interesting this season. Well for most people, anyway. [Entertainment Weekly]
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Oh good grief. Yesterday we were talking about Shia LaBeouf doing a movie with Robert De Niro and now we hear that he might be doing a movie with Brad Pitt! Everyone wants Shia! Why does everyone want Shia? It's honestly confounding how many people want Shia. But, yeah, want him they do, specifically for the movie Fury, about an American tank crew at the end of World War II. LaBeouf would play one of the shells that they shoot at the Nazis. Well, no, that's sadly not true. He'd play one of the soldiers under Brad Pitt's command. That's all. But why Shia, huh? Do people think we want more Shia? Because I think we've been at maximum Shia for a few years now. Even more than maximum Shia. Tone down the Shia, people. Before you leave the house in the morning, look in the mirror and take one Shia off. Less Shia is more Shia. That's all. [The Hollywood Reporter]
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Ugh. Chloe Grace Moretz, the new Carrie White and one of those precocious kid actor types who makes you wish that child acting was illegal, may have a part in some arty new thriller movie called Sils Maria, to be directed by Olivier Assayas. In it, Moretz would play a young actress who becomes the obsession of an older actress (Juliette Binoche) after taking a part that the older lady played years ago. So it's basically Black Swan in the acting world. I mean, not exactly, but y'know. Amadeus in the acting world. Something in the acting world. Ugh. Chloe Moretz. Worse than Shia! Well, ha ha, no that's absolutely not true. That could never be true. But, it's close. [Deadline]
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Focus Features has purchased the Matthew McConaughey AIDS drama Dallas Buyers Club and plans to release it some time in the fall/winter, meaning it's probably gonna be an awards movie. Or they'd like it be an awards movie, at least. This is the one based on the true story about the guy who, in 1985, "fought the U.S. medical and pharmaceutical companies after he was diagnosed with HIV." McConaughey lost all that weight for it. That one. And the one where Jared Leto plays some sort of ghost woman. Jennifer Garner's in it. It should be interesting. The Matthew McConaughey narrative of the past couple years has been leading toward a big Oscar movie, and this looks like it could be it. Imagine Matthew McConaughey winning an Oscar! It'd be like the 2000s never happened and he'd just come off Time to Kill. We'll be so young again! And all that has to happen is that Matthew McConaughey wins an Oscar. Just think of it! It'll be the '90s again! Sweet possibility! We can do it right this time! Oh please Academy god, make this thing happen. [Deadline]
